THE KNIGHT OF THE CARPET BAG.

Mount Ida Chronicle, Volume III, Issue 157, 8 March 1872, Page 5

THE KNIGHT OF THE CARPET BAG.

The following lines were suggested by readying, a local in the issue of the ' Tuapeka Times' of the 21st ult., in which some trayeller, who had lately visited Mount Ida gave, in language more forcible than true, an account of." the irretrievable' rtiin" 'which was

impending over that district.- _ The local to which we refer is not'now at our command, but we 1 commend.' the humble lines, to its author for perusal • ' :

HYSTERICAL VERSESFOUND IN THE

" IRRETRIEVABLE RUINS."

In Tuapeka, not long since, . Stood a knight of the Carpet Bag In a mix't steam and aroma of essence,

Gaiter'dj spurr!cl, and spruc'd up from toe to hat —- ... And God knows of his own he had never x a Any more than an old potato has that Indispensible outer skin : It's a fact! Skin ! the toughest of hides was his ; Well, with the *T. Times.' he made a compact

To give records of his travels; to hiss To order at any up-country town "Who dared on up-liited pinions to soar, With 4 ' Gabriel's," of angelic renown.

With soap and butter, a hem and a.haw, He began his tirade on Mount tfda- ;

He, the last man to deride her—"No doubt she's used up, and on her last legs, Not to speak of the near approach of the : frost; : . In short, the poor folks are close on hy-

sterics, And money, like water, is hopelessly lost Because it is not : Why, I showed but a "fiver"

In the main street: -From public and alley, Banks cookshops and grocers—(as when the Pied Piper In Hamelin land—so says Browning—- ; piped up the valley . And drew all the rats,, to a tune of tallow and sugar To a watery death from the banks of the

Weser) — Came tumbling, the lean, lank.population; Or as sharks who spied but a cask of John's

■ pickle — - . . " Which, by chance the blue waves closed upon On the voyage from Adelaide to Hongkong. In a scrape such as this I only could tickle Th'excitable crowd, so I said, 'Here, divide it;

Business presses; by your leave I'll make my ■ • exit.' .

The riot and strife that ensued I only can

guess ; ' As the note was I made myself less, - v And ne'er pulled from, a gallop, up hill and down,

Till I'd placed many miles "'twixt myself and •that town." Ed. T. T.— " Ah '. I'm so sorry, "but it's my duty to note The sad state of affairs ; so you think the • surh'tot-

A 1 means truly ' irretrievable ruin'?. Well, they've made their own bed that now they do stew in. My friend Sairey Gamp will "be glad of a hint,, For Sairey without gossip is as peas = without. . mint."

Well, friends one and"alT;"a; joke is a joke,< And this last one of Sairey 1 s almost makes

me choke; Bat in fairness, the next time, such wit she

concocts The source of her wit she should not keep within locks, But give a hint at the end that a de'il or

Punch Had drop'd a tit-bit, which just suited for

lunch ■ Such staid -old, ladies as Sairey Gamp and

T.T., With pickings to follow for a cold dinner tea.

In conclusion, I hope that their "districts" - improve, Con versely as the square of their wit, Then no doubt the K.C. to his friends will

remove, : ■ ■ ■ And keep clear of Mount Ida,, lest biter be bit. ■ .