COCKNEY WAR STORIES.

Manawatu Herald, Volume LI, Issue 4423, 6 March 1930, Page 4

COCKNEY WAR STORIES.

The London “Evening News” has been publishing “true” Cockney war stories, from which two examples are taken: — During repairs to entanglements, a Cockney found himself holding a stake while a Cornish comrade drove it home with a mallet. Suddenly a shed exploded and both were wounded. When the Cockney recovered consciousness he was heard to remark to his companion: ••Blimey, yer wants to be more careful with that there mallet; yer nearly ’it me ’and with it when that there firework exploded.” An aeroplane battle was raging over the hut near Ypres, where the battalion concert was in full swing. A German bomb demolished half the loof, and the audience was preparing to leave, when the Cockney sergeant-major mounted the platform and announced, “While the gents up there are settling their little differences, Private Smith will sing ‘Land of ’Ope and Glory.’ Nahl All together boys, and we’ll blow the other ’arf of the roof ’orf.” You also read of the heavy sleeping of an officer -who is aroused in a torpedoed ship -by the Cockney call: “Yer barf’s ready, sir.” Then, too, there is the Army Service Corps driver who drove over a precipice, and who then claimed to be the first man wiio looped the loop “in a blinking lorry.”