SHORT STORIES.

Manawatu Herald, Volume XLII, Issue 2154, 24 July 1920, Page 4

SHORT STORIES.

An amusing story is told concerning an Irishman who was passing a bird fancier’s one day, when his eye was caught by a notice in the window: “For sale, a bargain. : A splendid parrot. Speaks seven languages.” The Irishman walked into the shop, and after examining the parrot and hearing it talk in all its seven languages, purchased it and ordered it to be delivered at his address. Hurrying home in the evening, the first words he addressed to his wife were, “Did the bird come?” His wife replied in the affirmative, and added, “and it’s stuffed, roasted, and ready for ye. But I’m surprised at ye buyin’ such a poor thing. There’s no more than a mouthful of eatin’ on it.” “Ye cooked it?” screamed her husband.

, “Sure I did,” replied his wife, marvelling at his excitement. “But it wasn’t to be killed,” he gasped out. “It was a very valuable parrot, and I meant it for a present to ye. It was a wonderful talkin’ parrot; sure, that bird could spake sivin languages.” “Then why in the name of goodness,” demanded his wife, “didn’t it tell me so in one ’uv them?”

Pushing the perambulator in which her two children were comfortably ensconced, the mother strolled down the High Street with its shops full of attractive sale bargains. Suddenly her eye was caught by something in one of the windows. “Oh, what a duck of a hat,” she murmured, and leaving the perambulator she walked up to the window for a closer view. Now the street happened to be up, but so absorbed was she in the beauties of the hat that she was quite unconscious of the fact (hat the perambulator had rolled away iuto a trench. Suddenly, however, she was brought back to earth again by a gruff voice shouting out to her, “Say, missus, ‘d’yer want these kiddies any more? ’Cos we’re just going to fill the hole up.”