HONE REVIEWS THE WAR.

Manawatu Herald, Volume XXXVII, Issue 1428, 24 July 1915, Page 2

HONE REVIEWS THE WAR.

“Hulloa, Hone ! Back again?” “Too much te bally leak up above, isn’t it ? Hone jes like te rabbit. He keep inshide when te rain no stop. Py Kerry, I newer see te rain like dis fefore. Hone werry sorry for te young phellow in te camp at Rangiotu. Te bes way he buy Mitta Perreau’s hot pies and trink prenty coffee keep te inshide warm. Tat te way! If he like te Maori he newer get te measle. Te measle he got no chance if te pakeha eat te dry tuna an spud. Tat te way te Maori newer get te measle, Mitta Edita.” “What do you think about the war now, Hone ?” “Werra, I not down in te mout. I been read te noospaper werry hard—some te name I dunno. But I link te Rush jes foolin te bally Kaiser. He get him te werry long way in his country. Jus foolin him like te Maori catch te shark, and when he get him near te canoe he stick te hook in his gill. Then te General Goffer and ou r big chief, French, he put te twist in te tail at te utter end, and py kripe te shark make te werry big splash, but they get him alright. I link tat te way. But it take a lot of men to get te shark in te canoe, an he kick like blazes. He te werry big shark, te werry strong shark, te werry big mout, big teeth, an by kripe, better our feller look out for te smack down fefore he get him in te canoe. But be get him alright tis time. I link two year fefore we hang te shark up to dry, and den we have te werry big feast. Te Kaiser te werry worse shark in te world—but he soon die now.”

“Yes, that's a very nice figure, Hone, and I hope your prognostications will prove to be correct.”

“Kahnre mohio tat korero, Mitta Edita. But Hone werry sorry Amerika. Kino tat fella, His heart too small. Why he not give te shark te smack too ? I dunno. I tink he all te same te rabbit. When he hear te Turkey gobble he sit on te hind leg, cock up te ear, an run away ! No good Amerika wit te small heart. He only talk, talk, talk, while te Kaiser gobble him up. He te cranky feller alright. He sooner lose te woman an kid so long he keep te pocket full of money. No good Amerika, Too much te bally humbug. Te hen never let te dog collar te chicken like tat. Too much te German sausage about Amerika. But I tink te Talian he te ptucky chap. He get te smack in now, isn’t it? Italy te cousin for me now, ewery lime !” “Yes, Italy is a thorn in Aus* tria's side alright, Hone.” “I tink, Noo Zealand give a lot of money for te war. But te pakeha te funny feller. He ony give te money when he tink he goin to get te diwiden. Jus like he put te money on te totalisator an te two-up. He buy te ticket, one bob, half-crown, five bob, an tink he get te motor car, te piano, all sort taonga. No good tat way. Why he not give like te Maori when he., fight ? All te young warrior go, te whole tribe all in it —te wahine too. He can't win if he stay pehiu an put te money on te raffle. Why te pakeha rangitira not giwe te money witout te diwidend ? I don’t know. Some pakeha say, ‘Kapai te war, I get te big price for te bullock, te wool, te butter.’ But he only put te money on te raffle. He not te good man tat way. I tink te best way te Gowerment take te money from te greedy pakeha like te greedy pakeha take te laud from my grandfadder. Ino like te too much diwidend pakeha—he te greedy man. He ony give five bob to te poor soldier an put hundred quid in his own pocket. He te brudder for te poaka. Must go now, te ole woman wait for me at Walker and Furtie to pay lor te taonga.”