FLEET WEEK.

Manawatu Herald, Volume XXX, Issue 413, 21 July 1908, Page 4

FLEET WEEK.

Auckland is “ fleet mad.” One of its residents in a facetious vein has framed the following letter to “country cousins” meditating a visit to Auckland during that we.k, and it has been handed to us for publicatiou : “Dear cousin, —On no account must you arrive in Auckland without a flag on your shoulders, as otherwise you will be hooted out of the city.

“ Also on Sunday, 10th August, you must be prepared to bolt belter skelter down Queen Street immediately you hear a terrible clashing of bells, announcing the arrival of the Armada, for the edict hath gone forth, ‘ Let all bells ring.’, ‘ ‘ Should you meet a sailor, or the ghost of a sailor, you must immediately strip yourself of all your belongings, and offer them as a sacrifice. “ On no account must a sailor be allowed to walk over muddy or rough spot, but he must be gently carried.

“ Everything must be done with the view of entertaining our blooming American cousins, from rolling in the mud to lying aloug the tram tines waiting to be run over by a car. ‘ ‘ Anyone upsetting these arrangements will be considered unworthy of a New Zealander. — Yours truly, Cousin Mac. “ P.S. —Our most portly city councillor has kindly consented to crawl all fours up College Hill, afterwards rolling down on specially prepared mud.”