MARRIAGE AND LEAP YEAR.

Manawatu Herald, Volume XXX, Issue 399, 7 April 1908, Page 4

MARRIAGE AND LEAP YEAR.

Justification For Women s Proposals in 1908. (By Elizabeth S. Chesser, M.B. in the Daily Express.) It is a little hard that the twentieth-century young woman has still to depend on a man for a proposal. In spite of her emancipation, her freedom from most ol the restrictions,and limitations of her grandmother, she yet cannot take the initiative when it comes to a proposal of marriage. The newest woman, the most emancipated of her sex, is conventionality itself so far as proposing is concerned. And yet marriage means more to a woman ; she is more dependent for her happiness upon its good or ill success. But she cannot “choose” her life partner. It is her natural profession, her life’s work to make of herself a good wife and mother. If marriage is a failure, the wife has far less opportunity of finding compensation in work or outside interests. The average woman’s chief interests centre in the home. Natural woman believes in her inmost heart that the advantages of marriage far outnumber its disadvantages. There is a good deal of nonsense talked about the modern woman preferring bachelor independence to matrimony. WOMAN ’,<S INTEREST IN MARRIAGE. Marriage is still the greatest absorbing interest to the average woman, in spite of the changing conditions of life to-day. Book at woman’s attitude towaids a love affair; compare her keen interest and sympathy with man’s halfcontemptuous toleration. The crowds os women spectators at a wedding, the excitement which an engagement creates among the feminine friends and relations, the unconscious air of superiority of the newly-engaged, an illustrate the greater interest of the gentler sex in marriage as an institution. The great mass of women still regard marriage as their ulimate end. Even the working woman hopes, unconsciously perhaps, that her working days wiil be limited and that a husband and a home of her own will be her portion at some future date. Because “work” only satisfies woman while she as youth and vitality aud energy to fight'the world with. Not one girl in a thousand would hesitate between her “ career ” and the man she cares for. If she does not marry, it means that she has not met that man, or that he has not asked her. Ought she to be blamed for not marrying the man who has asked, but who does not attract her ? I.ATER MARRIAGES. Women marry later in life nowadays, not from choice, but necessity. Whereas marriage under twenty was usual a generation ago, and to be over twenty-five was to be a confirmed spinster, far more girls marry between twenty-five and thirty. Few men nowadays, can afford to marry much before the age of thirty. The modern young man docs not relish the idea of marriage on a small income. A long engagement, or a still longer ‘ ‘ understanding,” is much less expensive than married life. He is cute enough to realise that what is sufficient for one is not nearly enough for two without the economy and the “doing without” he is not willing to attempt. His income would not run to the luxuries of life; so the far-seeing modern 3’outh decides not to propose. Sometimes he does not feel justified in asking a girl accustomed to ever} 7 luxury to share his small income. A “sense of honour” keeps him silent; a feeling that it would not be fair to the girl to ask her to leave a life of irresponsibility for the grind of double harness with a general servant or a couple of inexperienced maids. In nine cases out of ten the girl would be only too willing to try, but she must wait for the proposal that does not come, and wonder why the man she knows is in love with her refuses to say so.

It is in such cases that there would be every excuse for the girl to do the proposing. The man judges so much from appearances. He sees a girl who spends her days at bridge and hockey and golf—a girl who is always well dressed and accustomed to every comfort. He cannot imagine her dressed in ready-made clothes and half-guinea hats. The girl may dress herself on a year and make half the things herself, but she'caunot say so. EOST HAPPINESS. Many a man and girl have lost their chance of happiness simply because the man is afraid to propose and the girl cannot. The nicest men are often the very ones who would be only to pleased to marry if it were not for the proposal. Leap year provides an opportunity. How many will take advantage of it ? Probably not one woman in a million, because, although there is no moral, practical, or romantic, reason against a woman proposing, conviction is too strong .for us all. After all, the actual spoken proposal has very little to do with; the matter. A girl has a hundred ways of letting a man know that she favours his “suit.” The average tna,n has a good idea of his chances of success. Leap year has very little influence on the marriage ratee, L,ast leap year the rate per 1000 was lower than it had been for some years; this year the Registrar-General will doubtless be satisfied if average is kept up. Although marriages are certainly later than formerly, and

fewer per 1000 o r the population than was the case, say, forty years ago, the decrease is not nearly so marked as the alarmist makes out, .Statistics show that the tendency to later marriages has increased these last twenty years. In the fast ten years, however, the figures work out to indicate that the average bridegroom to-day is only five months older than his predecessor of ten years ago. The average spinster is four months older than her sister —or, perhaps, her aunt — of ten years ago. The mean age for hi ides is twenty-five years six months ; the average bridegroom is just over twenty-seven. The figures are satisfactory from the commonsense point of view. Marriage at such ages is much more likely to turn out well than early marriage with the bride in her teens and her groom in his early twenties. The marriage of minors is nearly always to be deplored, so that it is pleasing to note the marked decrease in the number of marriages under age in the last ten or a dozen years. In the late seventies, 77 bridegrooms out of 1000 were minors, in 1906 there were only 43 per 1000. From 217 brides under age in the seventies, the rate fell to 145 per 1000 in 1906, Marriage is always more or less a lottery, but the chances of happiness are more hopeful where both are in their middle twenties at any rate.