A NOVEL FUNERAL

Manawatu Herald, Volume VII, Issue 244, 1 March 1889, Page 2

A NOVEL FUNERAL

« ___ There being no doubt but that persons addicted to imbibing too much spirits run a serious danger of going off in wbatis erroneously termed spontaneous combusrion, it was thought ad visible io bring this risk promineutly before, one who had a failing that way The iut-mion was to alarm him a bit, t>o that hi. expenditure in whiskey might be reduced, but unfortunately it had the very < pposite effect. Assuming a very grave coun enance he inquired if we really believed it possible, and we had to tell him that we had been reading Professor Liebig's pap-r on spontineous combustion; in whiob he admitted that forty eight cases had teen reported ; though tli y were not spontaneous, but the effect on the viotim was the same, because lorn, spark had caught the breath h«

was exhaling, and had then lighted. This statement rather staggered him, -.-. but hs braced himself to enquire whether the person consumed had c tused any danger to the premises, or left many remains. We told him that it had been reported that the bjdy entirely • isappears, down 4t a g-easy stain on the floor and some remains of bones. This made him quiet for a time, but at last his face lighted up, and he declared that he had arrived at the conclusion that that would be the cheapest style of funeral he could adopt, it would beat the new f angled cremation all to bits, as no oven would be required, the only expense would be the filling of himself up with whiskey to high water mark, and the further expense of a match ; as for the grease stains, why the landlord could clear that up for such a good customer, as he would have been. We much regretted telling this reckless man anything Upon this subject.