A COOL CUSTROMER.

Marlborough Express, Volume LI, Issue 243, 13 October 1917, Page 2

A COOL CUSTROMER.

DAYLIGHT THIEF DISGORGES

A Mei'rivale lady was engaged on Wednesday in "spring-cleaning" the dining-room in the front of the house (reports the Christchurch Press), and happening to glance through the window she saw a sturdy, middleaged man leaving by the front gate, carrying a large bag, which bulged suspiciously. She rushed after him, demanding to .see what was in the bag, and threatening to call her son, to which the man replied, with perfect truth, that there were no sons or husbands at home at that time of the day. Eventually, with much profane language, he turned out the bag, and brought to view the diningroom rugs and mats, which had been airing on the back lawn. He made the very lame excuse that he thought tho house was empty, so took what he saw, an/1 bocamo very indignant when called a thief. The lady had been suffering from toothache, and had a swollen face, and tho man oxprosed regret that ho "had .not got her round the back, or he would have, made her jaw double the: size." lie was evidently not without humor, for when he was told to make himself scarce, and consider himself "jolly lucky" that he was not handed over to the police, ho said: "Now don't get swearin' at a feller. One thing 1 hate is to hear a lady swear." He added, in threatening tones, that if anything wore said to the 'police, ho would return and burn the house down, if it took him years. How-1 evor, lie hastily decamped, and in tho course of his retreat took from his i capacious, bag a long white coat, I which ho donned, evidently under tho I impression that it would act «s a disguise-.