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Matamata Record, Volume II, Issue 98, 19 September 1918, Page 1

A pretty soldier story was told by the Hon. T. M. Wilford at the Soldiers' Club luncheon in Masterton on Thursday. The Minister stated that somewhere in France some New Zealand soldiers entered an inn where beer was retailed in the smallest measures. They each of them took a jug, which they had filled, and they then consumed the contents. As they left tiie inn three Belgian boys, who wer« seated in the corner, asked the lady bar-tender who were those strange fellows who had just departed. "Why, don't you know?" she replied. "Those are New Zealand tanks in action!"

One of the unexplained social phenomena arising in England from the war is tho noticeable predominance of young widows at tho altar. The Pall Mall Gazette has made an analysis of tho marriage statistics, and finds that while bachelors, widowers, and spinsters show even more than their usual hesitation about seeking mates, widows of marriageable age are coming more than ever to the fore. This promises to result in a greater number of " old maids " than ever in the history of the country for two reasons. There are fewer available husbands and the widows are cornering the limited supply. Force of habit is often responsible for amusing incidents. One of these occurred in the Christchurch Magistrate's Court on Friday afternoon during the hearing of a Defence case. A sergeant-major instructor was giving evidence concerning the non-at-tendance at parades of a young delinquent, when he found that his roll papers had been disarranged. "As you were," he commanded in a peremptory tone while he proceeded to straighten out the documents. A "loud" smile went round the Court, as this was the second occasion upon which the same instructor had made this " break."

In a recent issue of the Young Helpers League Magazine, the official organ in connection with Dr. Barnardo's homes, the following information, is given concerning the occupant of the Morrinsville cot: " Harold, a boy of eleven years is ill with measles. He is a London boy. His father drinks, and is idle and worthless. His poor mother works hard to keep the family. To help her, and to give Harold a better chance in life, he has been taken into the Homes. He is a nice boy, and is doing well at school, so there is every possibility of him growing up into a fine manhood, and being a credit to those who have helped him in his troubled childhood.',

" No Man's Land has its tragedies' but it has its humour, also " said the Rev. W. Walker, Chaplain to the Forces, in the course of an address in Christchurch. '"One night when we were in the trenches it became quite evident that something had happened —I don't know what—which had made the enemy ' get his wind up.' He thought he was going to be raided, so put up a S.O.S. signal, and brought down a barrage of German shells on No Man's Land. This puzzled our men, and they immediately suspected that this was a German protective for a raiding party. "We therefore sent up a S.O.S. also, and our barrage commenced on the same spot. Thousands of shells poured down there, yet no one was out in No Man's Land. It is all right to laugh, but £20,000 to £30,000 worth of shells were spent there and no one was hurt!"