HE GUESSED HED FIGHT.

Lyell Times and Central Buller Gazette, Volume VI, Issue 265, 20 March 1886, Page 4

HE GUESSED HED FIGHT.

Politeness was born in him, and be couldn't help it He drifted into a prominent town in the south soon afer Johnston's surrender, and before any body's lem per had cooled down. He was after cotton, and he let the fact be known. He was from Connecticut, and he did not try to conceal it. He hadn't been iu the town two hour? before an 14 unregenerated" pulled his nose. 11 Ah—yes!" said the man from Ton necticut. " Was that accidental ?" " No' sir! No, sir!" was the fierce rejoinder H Did it a purpose, eh ?" u Of course I did!" M Well, I should'nt a thought it of you I I'll pass it oyer as a case of temporary insanity." An hour later, as he sat in the hotel, a fire-eater approached him and spat on bis boots and stood and glared at bim

" Tou must have a wobble to your tongue if you can't spit straighter than that," said the man from Connecticut.

" I meant so, sir—l meant so!" 11 Wanted to Ret me mad, eh ?" u Yes, sir I Yes, sir !" u You shouldn't do so. When I'm roused I'm a bard man to handle. I'll excuse this on the grounds that you don't know me " In the afternoon be was given a hint that he bad better leave the town at once, and, when he demurred, a lawyer sent him a challenge

M What's it fur ?" asked the Yankee, as he rrad the missive.

u Yon insulted him, and he demands satisfaction," explained the messenger u Can't I argy the case with him ?" 41 No, sir I" * S'pose'n I give him sdol. to settle ?' "He wants to fight, sir. And you must either fight or he will horsewhip you !" " Warm me up with a rawhide eh ?" "He will I" M Shoo! but who'd a thought it 1 Say, l'il gin him lOdoi." "Sir! You likewise insult me." M Do, eh! I swan I didn't mean to. Then I've got to fight ?" '• You ha?e 1" 11 May get killed, or kill the other feller?" " Exactly."

** Well, I'm kinder sorry. I never had but one fight in my lite, and then I got licked. I don't want to be hurt, and I don't want to injure anybody else, and—

* You'll wait to be horsewhipped/' " I rather guess not. I guess I'll fight l'Jl choose rifles at twenty paces, and you can pick out your own ground. Just let me know when it is to come off, and I'll try to be thar.'' It came off next morning. He was thar. They offered bim an oppora tunity to appologise, but he would'nt touch it. He stood up as stiff as a new barn door, and bored a bullet through his man's shoulder, and came off without a scratch himself.

" Bern' as I am out here now, and bein' as somebody else may want to horsewhip me to«morrer, would'nt this be a food time fur him to show up and save time ?" he asked as he leaned on his rifle and looked around him. No one showed up. The Yankee liked the town, and sent for his family. The people liked the Yankee, ard made him postmaster, and he stuck there until five years ago.