THE LOITERER IN KUMARA.

Kumara Times, Issue 214, 11 June 1877, Page 2

THE LOITERER IN KUMARA.

“FESTINA lentb.”

Come, come, Mr Editor, it is really too bad of you to cut me up into small pieces in the way you do. lam not writing a three volume novel, to be issued iu thrilling chapters, “To be continued iu our next.” Can’t you manage to keep out such rubbish as the telegrams about “rainfall” and “coursing dogs,” and contradictory messages as to “ war news,” and make room for my contribution, which, between ourselves, is the only tiling that and trouble themselves to read.

I have received the following, which I have uo doubt will be interesting news to some of my readers.. “In the press, and will shortly be published, a new tale, entitled ‘The Doings of Shuffling Tom; or, the Man who didn’t know his own Mind.’ ”

A friend of mine, who is- of a statistical turn of mind, informs me that the newspapers circulating in Kumara contain advertisements referring to sweeps (I don’t allude to the enterprising Mr Berry) to the amount of £13,200. He tells me that this amount would give about a pound sterling to every man, woman, and child in Westland.

There have been several mysteriously worded paragraphs in the Kumara Times during the past week as to the disappearance of a billiard marker, who has last been heard of as being on his way to Christchurch. Can the following advertisement, which appeared in the Christchurch “ Press ” last Saturday, have any connection with “ Toedlums”?—“Wanted to rent a Billiard Room in Town or Country j state terms. A. 8., office of this paper.” I have no wish to be locked up by the police in this cold weather. Of course I have not, nor for the matter of that do I wish to be locked up during hot weather. The cells must be remarkably cold and comfortless at any time, but why should the Court-house be so too ? I remember seeing a poor fellow brought in charged with having been drunk, and a witness said “ Your Worship can see he has the shakes now-” So he had. His teeth were chattering like a Christy Minstrel corner man’s bones; but the • same remark might be made in regard to any one who has to remain an hour or two in the Court.

What's in a name? I see there is a public body called the “Ouse Road Board.” Perhaps I ought to say that it is not the Arahura Road Board. Frank Truman.