SOLDIER’S EXCUSE

Hauraki Plains Gazette, Volume 52, Issue 3275, 14 June 1943, Page 3

SOLDIER’S EXCUSE

RELIGIOUS CARD PLAYER CARDS'SERVE AS BIBLE “PURITY OF INTENTION” A private soldier, by the name of Richard Lee, was taken before the Magistrates for playing cards during Divine service. The sergeant commanded the soldiers at the church and when the parson had read the prayers, he took the text. Those who had Bibles took them out, but this soldier had neither Bible nor Common Prayer Book, and pulling out a pack of cards, he spread them out before him. He first looked at one card and then at another. The sergeant of the company saw him and said: “Richard, put up the cards: this is no place for them.” “When the • service was over, the constable took Richard a prisoner and brought him before the Mayor. “Well,” said the Mayor, “what have you brought the soldier here for?” “For playiiig cards in the church.” “Well, soldier, what have you to say for yourself?” “Much, sir, I hope.” “Very good; if not I will punish you severely.”

“I have been,” said the soldier, “about six weeks on the march. I have neither Bible or Common Prayer Book. I have nothing but a pack of cards, and I hope to satisfy your Worship of the purity of my intentions. Then, spreading the cards before him, he began with y the ace. “When I see the ace it reminds me that there is but one God. When a see the deuce, it reminds me of the Father and Son. When I see the tray, it reminds me of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost. When I see the four, it reminds me of the four Evangelists that preached—Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. When I see the five, it reminds me of the five wise and 5 were foolish and were shut out. When I see the six, it reminds me that in six days the Lord made heaven and earth. When I see the seven, it reminds me that on the seventh day God rested, for the great work he had made; and hallowed it. When I see the eight, it reminds me of the eight righteous persons that were saved when God destroyed the world, viz., Noah and his wife, his three sons and their wives. When I see the nine, it reminds me of the nine Lepers that were cleansed by our Saviour—there nine out of the ten returned thanks. When I see the ten it reminds me of the Ten Commandments, which God handed down to Moses on the tablets of stone. When I see the King it reminds me of the Great King of Heaven, which is God Almighty. When I see the Queen, it reminds me of the Queen of Sheba, who vjsited Solomon, for she was a wise woman as he was a man. She brought with her fifty boys and fifty girls, all dressed in boys’ apparel for King Solomon to tell which were boys and which were girls. The King sent for water for them to wash—the girls washed to the elbows, the boys to the wrists, so King Solomon told by that.” “Well,” said the Mayor, “you have described every card in the pack except one.” “What is that?” “The Knave,” said the Mayor. “I will give your Honour a description of that, too, if you will not be angry.” “I will not,” said the Mayor, “if you do not term me to be the knave.” “The greatest knave I know is the constable who brought me here.” “I do not know,” said the Mayor, “if he is the greatest knave, but he is the greatest fool.” The soldier then continued: “When I count how many spots there are in a pack of cards, three •hundred and sixty-five, as many days as there are in a year and there are twelve picture cards in a pack, representing the twelve months in a year, and when I count the cards in a pack, I find fifty-two, the number of weeks in a year, and on counting the tricks I count thirteen, the number of weeks in a quarter. So you see, a pack of cards serves for a Bible, an almanac and a Common Prayer Book.” Then the Mayor let him go.