CHURCH WORSHIP.

Hauraki Plains Gazette, Volume XXXV, Issue 4690, 26 April 1924, Page 3

CHURCH WORSHIP.

REASONS FOR NON-ATTENDANCE. A FEW SUGGESTIONS. Faint-hearted Protestants who have exhausted their present stock .of paltry excuses for neglect of religious worship and who desire fresh tales to pi esent to lenient vicars, may (states a commentator) find a few suggestions in the following list read by an Anglican vicar (Rev. J. L. Ge’dthorpe (late of Wyndham, Soutn Otago, and now of Eltham, to an evening congregation recently : — Too deaf to hear the sermon. (Could hear a political address, though). Too lame to walk so far. (Could wa'k much farther, playing a game of bowls) Cannot get the family up to breakfast. Got home too late to dress. Clothing too shabby. (He goes to the pictures, though). Cannot get into the way of going, having stayed away so long. Alwaays htaavttaaoe coma \lways have company ou Sundays. (Bring company along with you). Windows always open (can’t stand draught). Mr too close, cannot breathe, church is too stuffy. Children too young to leave ; have no servant. (Gets to theatre, though). Don't like the singing; choir not balanced. Minister ha,s not called for ever :o long. No one ever takes any notice of me when I go. Always see a man there who cheated me ten years ago. Minitser did not call when I was sick. (How was he to know ?) Preacher has got a very poor delivery. Ixist my husband, and do not thinn God is just. Church is always begging—wants all a man has got. Mniister preached right at me, I see so many hypocrites at church. (Does not notice the bigger ones out - side.) The church is only for the rich ; poor folk get no show. Can live just as good a Christian at home. Always have a headache on Sundays. Can't go till I get a new hat. Vicar passed me on the street and never spoke. "Do you recognise any of them ? They are all well worn,” said the preacher—“threadbare, in fact. I have another list top long to quo"? from. If anyone is short of an excuse I can provide one.” The vicar, with a fine discrimination m the use of words, calls the above statements excuses, not reasons. People would doubtless find equally as many excuses for not riding to church in a bullock dray to-day, instead of in a motor-car, though the bullock dray was good enough half a century ago. Slaves, haunted by craven, superstitious fears, might go anywhere they were bidden to go, and by any means, but free people may expect as ranch advance in the spiritual outlook as the motor-car is ahead of the bullock dray. People of Protestan. leanings like their religion kept as up-to-date as any ether interest in life.