PITHY PARAGRAPHS.

Hauraki Plains Gazette, Volume XXXII, Issue 4305, 17 August 1921, Page 2

PITHY PARAGRAPHS.

FROM RIVERS COMMISSION.

“The one Thing that keeps Paeroa alive is having royal commissions about silt.” —Mr Richmond.

Asked by Mr Johnstone whether or not there was a considerable improvement in the state of the Hauraki Plains during '.the past 30 years, a witness, W. Turner, laconically remarked that there had been a great improvement in price.

“I suggest to you,” said Mr Johnstone to a witness, “that if you were asked to take .the velocity ef the five? you would not judge it by a floating dead cow, as’ other witnesses have done.” “It is time this cow was in-, terred,” added Mr Clendon.

Mr Couper was asked if the wood taken out, of the river by the Extraction Company was used by the company for fuel. “Other, peoplie used it,” was the reply.

“How could you tell what distance away the dead carcases of cattle were in the river?” a witness was asked.' “They smelled pretty- high, and one got the range that way,” was the reply.

A commissioner made a horrible “lapsus linguae.” He wanted, to know how many feet pertain materials travelled in a “cubic second.” He was not., so adroit as the butler who, dropped a plate containing sheeps’ tpngues, and wittily apologised by remarking tha.t it was merely a “lapsus linguae”—slip of the tongue.

“These particles are 1-30,000 th pari of an inch in diameter,” said a technical witness. Our scribe was inte~J ested ;to know whether the said particles were solid or hollow, but this very important piece of information was not forthcoming—i.t might have made a difference to the “specific gravity.” And if these minute particles were hollow, what a’ frightful speed they would attain if caught in a "vertical current!”

Mr Richmond was having a shot at Sir J. Couper, Lying to disconcert the witness. He remarked that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing. “Yes.” replied Mr Couper, “but the danger is not always to those who use it.” This was an allusion to the fact that -the town and farming interests were now getting backed up by expert evidence, which they had not had hitherto. Now we will have the full flavour of the classical quotation from Pope : A little knowledge is a dangerous thing; Drink deeply, or touch not of the

Pierian spring; Shallow draughts intoxicate the brain, But drinking deeply sobers us again.