IN LIGHTER VEIN

Hokitika Guardian, 5 August 1931, Page 2

IN LIGHTER VEIN

“Look at that poor old blind nigger.” “Yes, but being blind he does not know he is a nigger.” Molly: I wonder if Lee will love me when I’m old. Milly: You’ll know pretty soon, now. Lady (in butcher’s shop): Have you no scruples whatever? Butcher: No, ma’am; but I can order you some for to-morow. “Well, if I didn’t see you, you must have a double!” “Yes, I think I will.” Ikey: Dad, I want to he an airman. Moses: Veil, get yourself an aeroplane and 1 will give you the air to fly in. First Hunter: And how can you detect an elephant, Second: You smell a faint odour of peanuts on his breath. Artist: I’d like to paint your P°l“ trait, Have you ever beep dope ip oil? City Man; Yes; I lost £20,000 in a petroj spepulatipp. Mistress; Wily do you slam all the doors like that, Mary? New Maid: It’s hereditary, ma’am. My father is a railway guard. Politician: “Now, my friends, when von vote, you don’t want to buy a pig in the poke. No—you want to vote for me and get the genuine article.” Stenographer: You little daughter wants to kiss you over the ’phone. Busy Manager: Take the message. I’ll get it from you later. Dinner Partner: So you are in a way the conductor of the New World Express ? Doctor: No, madam —only the brakeman, A missionary declares that he saw a native chief in the South Sea Islands wearing a necklace of tin-openers. It is comfortable to think that cannibalism is on the wane.