HAPPY MOMENTS

Hokitika Guardian, 21 May 1931, Page 8

HAPPY MOMENTS

Angry shareholder: May I ask what has happened to our sinking fund? Chairmanlt sank.

, Hawkins: Smith claims that when charity is needed lie is always the first to put his hand in his pocket. Markley: Yes: and he keeps it there till the danger is over! Young Husband . Last night when I got home my wife had my chair drawn up before the fire, my slippers ready for me to put on, my pipe fiTled, and--Cynic: How did you like her new hat? Girl: How much do you charge for a marriage license? Registrar: Nine-and-sevenpence, lmss “But I have only five shillings with me.” “Then you’re Lucky.” Friend : Your wi.e is strong-minded, isn’t she, Littlejohn? Littlejohn: Strong-minded? A furni-ture-polish hawker came here yesterday, and in less than five minutes she sold him some polish she had made herself. 'Mrs ’Awkins: They tell me yew husband's locked up, Mrs Rope, an’ there’s a woman in the case, I’m informed. Mrs ’Awkins: Yes; they say he is charged with Miss Demeanour! The little hoy was asked if he knew who Atlas was. “A giant who was supposed to support the world,” answered the boy. “Oh, he supported the world, did he?” “Well, who supported Atlas?” “I expect he must have married a rich wife.”