CURRENT WIT

Hokitika Guardian, 13 November 1930, Page 3

CURRENT WIT

Two months after lie had run ovei a girl,- a motor-cyclist- married her. L this sort of thing were made compel sory, there woind be less reckless drn

A judge- declares that -Some law.are hard on unmarried men. But no half so hard as some in-laws, are ot married men.

If an automobile manufacture! wants to advertise the sturdy «ndu. anee of his car, ho might say thai it will last until it is paid for.

A big-game hunter says that hi knows no sound more delightfully uii-rilling than the noise made by a herd of elephants stampeding. He would make an ideal tenant for a bottom fiat.

“The modem woman,” says a sport ing paper, “frequently bets.” Du ..cii, lamy 1 mis nuieli on.

Marriage, says a novelist', does not prevent a capable woman from exiressmg herself. On the contrary, ii neaiis that shy lias provided liers'-ii vith a permanent audience.

Schoolboys are of opinion thin masters think too much of punishments. That posteriority complex!

A writer on modern children asserts that mothers find it- difficult to makt them believe I a ivy-tales. lathers, we are told, are apt to encounter a aim.*, lar difficulty in the case of modern mothers.

The next invention, ive read, will bo a higb-powQrcd car that can leap from the ground and travel several yards 'through ,tlie air. But almos.. any ear can do that already on some of our roads.

A man who had concealed stolen watches in his pliiH-lours was arrested on a railway station just as he had missed a train. And he thought hr had bags of time, too!

“‘Those who laugh most/’ says a doctor “have the healthiest appetites.” Now we know why the boarding-house guests who has an inexhaustible supply of funny stories is always frown-,-cl at by the prop riot re c.

“Many accidents are caused by bursting tyres,” says a motoring ex-. )Another ‘cause is. a. tight knot at the steering-wheel.

“Some men quickly lose interest, in tilings,” says a reformer.. That’s not so bad' as losing capital' in tilings.

A new popular song is called I lint s Ml.” Biit the trouble is that it isn’t; there are hound to he lots more. “There is only one way to get the pest o,ut of your garden.”—Weekly paper. Let, him have the lawn-mower. “Can I lend you a fiver? bet me see.” The Colonel drew a mallet from his pocket.—Newspaper serial. The tapper tapped. SILLY SEASON MARATHON. On a Southern farm, a turkey gobbler is (sitting on twenty-one eggs—the big sissie.