WHAT ABOUT THE POOR OLD GROOM.

Hutt News, Volume 2, Issue 26, 21 November 1929, Page 7

WHAT ABOUT THE POOR OLD GROOM.

Why is it that one can go through, life imagining that one knows all about some old-established cratom, and wih.en put to the test fail miserably?

Scarcely anyone sees anything formidable in arranging a wedding—until a beginning is made.

"Oh, "well," says the mother, "I can't quite remember which, side of tie church the bride's guests sit in,but I know all about the breakfast." But does she? , ,

She excuses herself for not remembering too much about her own wed-

ding by saying: "I was much too excited 'to notice.' ' Still, she ihas been to dozens since, and feels quite confident. ■••.'• -

• Then the worry starts, Mother cannot quite remember this and that; so the family invests in an etiquette book which, is read with a good deal of amusement.

The average books sets out in detail what the bride is to wear, the bridesmaids' frocks, even adding- a hint about all being c'onst&^ed, lest the chief attendant is a little selfish in the matter of choosing her own particular colour.

. It tells the bride that white is still the usual wear for "her, that the veil is fastened with orange blossom, and that it should fall over the face when the bride is entering the cliureh; it states how many, boots and shoes and stockings go with the trousseau; it mentions the delicate matter of settlements, and says that the bride's people are expected to provide the cars to take the house party to church.

The bride even receives a hint that she should not wear tigt gloves or rings on her left hand.

The bridegroom is directed to be at the chm-ch, with his best man, about half an iouT in advance of the bride; he is told what to do with: the ring, and he receives a gentle -hint in the matter of the clergyman's fee.

Then the poor old groom seems largely left to vla^awii devices, andj naturally, he bl'giplil^-worry. He asks liiiS. •&rie'n^^ about appaTel for an ey«fiiiig yrejiding. He knows he needs "fttlircy.Siring dress, and', with .his best 'BDtan, .ij well provided in that respeotV: "dSs&^iirere is his future.* ;£&.-' ther-iMaw. *J?he old gentleman been, to a formal evening par^p* fo£ 25 years, «nd is a slay.eHo.viiSu^ aiuner-jae-ket' ■;• ' ,:-.-*y^®s/ •/:'■;•■■■'■■

ISTot only that; He has just invested jtn&hy^^t^eiws J&& new diniieT outfit, and^i: ;<&«& rriot see his way to aTto^tker'-15 or so for "tails." He

!sias but one daughter to marry, and [there it is.

■Sympathetic friends advise a day time wedding, but the best man then plumpfc for a sac suit. He, too, looks at the expense, and sees himself landed with morning clothes that are going to be a drug on the maTket. There is the silk -hat, too.

"How many times in your life," asks the best man, "do you need, a silk hat in this country?"

Some time ago this question of a silk hat caused amusement to t>he w&dding caused amusement to the ' wedding" party. T&e bride's brother, elderly and absent-minded, was to give her* away. On the morning of the wedding, a public holiday, he arrived from the country minus this important item.

Now, he was a big man wit& a big head; and the bridegroom was small,, with a corresponding head, However, the bridegroom entered the church with the hat. it was smuggled out, and tne bride's brother then carried 't in when he conducted the bride.

In the vestry it was pasepd over to the groom, who duly wore it' away.

Wedding troubles do not end with the groom and his attendants. Sometimes there is. a chairman who candidly admits that he has a very foggy idea of 'his duties,

One asked- recently if there was some secret signal which he gave for the •breakfast to begin. Also, when did he J begin his speeches? With the first r course? .'■■')

The poor man actually laboured under the delusion that he proposed all the toasts, and was worried, not only as to what he was to say, but. f al3o about the replies.

When told his duties he wiped, his )brow, and sighed with relief.

"I-learned, three separate "speeches," 3io said, "but when it,came to a fourth I absolutely ran dry."