Arrived Per Comet

Horowhenua Chronicle, 15 June 1910, Page 4

Arrived Per Comet

• —• - One Charles Townsfield, an ,\iiu> ricau .som tii.au, wiho \\":ks lucked up in Melbourne recently by Cuius table Barclay lor behaving in ;ui offensive majiner, had got himself up in women's garments, and, surrounded by a ring of street strollers, was performing a vaudeville turn in Lonsdale street. Townseml (the Argus reports) was doling a high kicking act with immense success, for he. had already kicked hiin.sel!' imto the water-channel twice. along with a section of the front row of spectators, whetn Ba.n\lay swoopixt down on the gathering and ruined •the show. The constable's interference wa.s greeted with groansa:nd hisses, and cries of "loave the woman alone,' 'and it was n'ot till lie had charged his prisoner who refused to sipeak, and turned "her" over to the matron on dutty to he searched, that the discovery was made. Townsend woirt* a ba.t that looked liko a wrecked bi-plane, a draggled old Mack skirt, black bbuse, a ilieavy black v-eil and a fur round, his neck that resembled the tail of a common yellow dog—and probably was. He also won* blucher boots, sported a bald head and a long grey moustache. So much of his face as was not conceded by the ve.il, the bi-pkne hat and the, dog tail, was shaded with burnt cork. When asked for an explanation. he said he had arrived 011 earth by sliding down the comet's tail. "I'm an inhabitant. of Mars," lie said, "and I'm chock full of oxvgen. I wasn't high kicking; I was merely it a king high steps. I want to go bark home. T don't think much of this place, anyway; tihe policemen are a nuisance, and von have to" pay for your oxvgen." "Go in .there, you're drunk." said the watch-houso keeper, as he tore the feminine frippery off the "Martian" and thrust him iinto a cell. "There's a mnnikin. of water foi vo, an' honld vox tongue till his Worship deals wid yo t'morra."