LITERATURE.

Globe, Volume XXIII, Issue 2245, 9 May 1881, Page 3

LITERATURE.

A BACHBLOB EECLAIMED. Br H. T. T. ■ Vou are determined not to marry V 'Absolutely.' ' And why ?' ' In the first place, I never expeot to be able to support a wife according to my ineas of comfort. In the second place, I have no hope of meeting a woman who will sympathise sufficiently with my feelings and views to be a congenial companion. Thirdly, I cannot bear the idea of adopting as constant associates the relatives of her I may love And fourthly, I consider house-keeping, and all the details of domestic arrangements, the greatest bore in existence.' This colloquy took place between two young men, in the garden of one of the fashionable hotels at ~ar»toga. It was a sultry afternoon, and they had retired under tbe bhade of an apple tree to digest their dinner, which process they were facilitating by occasionally puffing some very mild, light brown Havana cigars. The last remark was uttered in a very calm and positive tone by McNeil, a philosophical and quiet gentleman, who had a most sensible theory for everything in life. Among other things, he took great pleasure in tbe conviction that he thoroughly understood himself. The first time his interest was truly excited by a member of the gentler sex he had acted in the most extravagant manner, and barely e»caped with honor from forming a most injudioions connection. To guard against similar mishaps he had adopted a very ingenious plan. Being uncommonly susceptible to female attractions, he made it a role, when charmed by a sweet face or thrilled by a winning voice, to seek for some personal defect or weakness of character in the fair creature, and obstinately dwell upon these defects, until they cast a shade over the redeeming traits, and dissolved the spell he feared. When this course failed, he had but one resource. With Falstaff, he thought discretion the better part cf valor, and deliberately fled from the allurements that tbre*tened hlo peace. Thus he managed not to allow love to take permanent pot session, and after various false alarms and exciting vigils, came to the conclusion that no siege or sudden attaok would ever subdue the citadel of his affections. But MoNiel had so braced himself in a spirit of resistance that he had made no provisions against the unconscious lures of beauty. He could chat for hours with a celebrated belle, and leave her without a sigh; he could smile at the captivating manners whioh overcame his fellows. Beaarding society as a battle-field, he went thither armed at all points, resolved to maintain his self-possession and be on the watch against the wiles of woman. He had eeen lovely girls in the arawing-room, followed their graceful movements in the dance, heard them breathe songs of sentiment at the piano, and walked beside them on promenade. On these occasions he coolly formed an estimate of their several graces, perfectly appreciated every finely ch Belled nose and tempting lip, noted with care tbe color and expression of the eye, but walked proudly away at parting, murmuring to himself, "All this I see, yet am not in love." But who can anticipate the weapon that shall lay him low, or make adequate provisions against the inexhaustible resources of love 1 McNiel had sat for a week at table, opposite an invalid widow and her daughter. He had pasted them potatoes not less than a dozen t.mes, and helped the young lady twice to cherry pie. Tne only impression he had derived from their demeanor and appearance was that they were very genteel and quiet. On the morning after his conversation in the garden he awoke just before sunrise, and found himself lying with his face to the wall, in one of the diminutive chambers in which visitors at the Springs are so unceremoniously packed. His eyes opened within six inches of the plnster ; and he amused himself for some minutes in conjuring the cracks and veins it displayed into imaginary forms of warriors and animals. At length his mind reverted to himself and his present quarters. 'Well, I've been here just a fortnight,' thus he mused, ' and a pretty dull time I've had of it. Day after day, the same stupid routine. In the morning I swallow six glasses ef Congress water at the spring, with the hollow eyes of that sick minister from Connecticut glaring on me like a -:e - pent, and the die-away tones of that nervous lady from Philadelphia sounded like a knell in my ears. I cannot drink in peace for those everlasting Misses Hill, who all three chatter at once, and expect me to be entertaining and talkative so early in the_ morning, with my stomacn full of cold liquid, and a long day in perspective. Then oomes breakfast. The clatter of plates, the murmur of voioes, the rushing of the black waiters, and the variety of steams, make me glad to retreat. I find a still corner of the pi»zza, and begin to read ; but the flies, a draught of air, or the intrusive gabble of my acquaintances, utterly prevent me from becoming absorbed in a book. It has now grown too warm to walk, and I look in vain for Dr. Clayton, who is the only man here whose conversation interests me. ' I avoid the billiard-room because I know whom I shall meet there. The swing is occupied. The thrumming on the piano of that old maid from Providence makes tbe saloon uninhabitable. They are talking politics in the bar-room. The very sight of the newspapers gives me a qualm. I involuntarily begin to doze, when that infernal gong sounds the hour to dress. No matter ; anything for a relief. Dinner is insufferable ; more show and noise than relish and comfort. How gladly I escape to the garden and smoke. That remi' ds me of what I told Jones yesterday about matrimony. He laugh* d at roe. But there's no mistake about it. Catch me to give up my freedom, and provide for a family, be pestered with a whole string of new connections, when I can't bear those I have now ; never havea moment to myself, be obliged to get up in the night for a doctor, have to pay for a boy's schooling, and be plagued to death by him for my pains, be bothered constantly with bad servants, see my wife lose her beauty in a twelvemonth, from care, my goddess become a household drudge, give up cigars, keep precise hours, take care of sick children, go to market! Never, never !* As his revery thus emphatloally terminated, McNeil slowly raised himself to a sitting posture, in order to ascertain the state of the weather, when a sight presented itself which at once put his philosophy to flight and Btartled him from his composure. He did not cry oat, but hushed his very breath. Beside him lay a female form in profound slumber. Her hair had escaped from its confinement, an 1 lay in the richest profusion around her face. There was a delicate glow npon the cheeks. The lips were scarcely parted. The brow was perfectly serene. One arm was thrust under her head, the other lay stretched upon the cover-lid. It was one of those accidental attitudes which sculptors love to embody. The bosom heaved regularly. One felt that it was the slumber of an innocent oreature, arjd beneath that calm breast beat a kindly and pure heart. McNeil bent over this vision, for so at first it seemed to him, as did Narcissus over the crystal water. The peaceful beauty of that face entered his very soul. He trembled at the still regularity of the long, dark eye lashes, as if it were death personified. B"Govering himself, all at once something familiar struck him in the countenance. He thought awhile, and the whole mystery was solved. They occupied the adjoining chamber ; she had gone downstairs in the night to procure something for the Invalid, and on returning entered, in the darkness, the wrong room, and fancying her mother asleep, had very quietly taken her place beside her, and was soon lost in slumber. No sooner did thia idea take possession of McNeil, than, with the utmost oaution and a noieeleßs movement, he removed every vestige of his presence into a vaoant apartment opposite, leaving the fair intruder to suppose she alone had occupied the room. At breakfast he observed the mother and daughter whisper and smile and soon ascertained that they had no suspicion of the actual state of the case. With the delicacy that belonged to his character, McNeil inwardly vowed to keep the secret forever in his own breast. Meantime; with much apparent hilarity, he prepared- to accompany Jones to Lake George. His companion marvelled to perceive this unwonted gayety wear off as they proceeded in their ride. McNeil became silent and pensive. The evening was

fine, and they went npon the Jake to enjoy the moonlight. Jones sung his best nom* and woke the echoes with his bnglf. His friend remained silent, wrapt in bis cloak at the boat's stern. At last, very abruptly, he sprang np, ordered the rowers to land him. ■ "Where are ynu going?" inquired Jcnas. •• To Saratoga," was the reply "Not tonight, sorely ? " "Yes, now, this instant." .Entertaining some fears of his friend's safety, Jones re uc'.ontly devoted that lovely night to a haid ride over a Bandy road, instead of lingering away its delightful hours on the sweet bosom of the lake. Bix months after, MoNeii married the widow's daughter, the ensuing summer, when I met Hm at Saratoga Springs, he assured me he found it a delightful residence.