THE LOAFER IN THE STREET.

Globe, Volume XXII, Issue 2027, 23 August 1880, Page 3

THE LOAFER IN THE STREET.

If there be one virtue more beautiful than another it is filial affection. Anyhow, it strikes me like that on account perhaps of it being anything but common here. A friend of mine recently arrived from the South gave me a few days sines a pleasing instance of dutiful behaviour on the part of his son to his papa. The old man, who is well to do, is very smart at a bargain, a virtue which is inherited by his son. The latter was recently assisting a friend to bring home some cattle, amongst whom was a very fat steer. The friend suggested that the young gentleman should buy the steer. They dealt. The price was £5. On returning home the purchase met with much approval from the paternal, so much so, that incautiously the old man offered his son 30s on his bargain, whatever it was. Tbo youth accepted promptly. “And whot might you have given for him?” said the paternal. “ Six pound ton,” said the business like bay, “ so, if you give me eight pounds we are straight.” Thus did he play it down low on the old man.

Some people can be tactful and apt under any circumstances, not to say funny. The Hon. John Hall seems a bit that way. A short while since a well-known young gentleman called J # *n who happened to be a little uncertain as to what to adopt for his career in life, telegraphed as follows to the Premier:—“ lam condemned to death. My anxious friends desire to know the period fixed for my execution.” The following response was quickly wired : —“ Tour death warrant is not yet signed. Possibly you may yet be reprieved,” In another province there was recently a rather involved bankruptcy case, in which a gentleman at present was concerned. When I say concerned, I mean he was a creditor. Going North or South, as the case might be, on business, he called on the legal gentleman who was acting as trustee for the estate, and he being absent from town, he asked the clerk when any symptoms of eventual settlement might be expected to develop themselves. The clerk could not inform him, but would write word shortly. In about six weeks’ time my friend got a letter from this young gentleman, saying that owing to unforaeen difficulties there was not much chance of the estate being cleared up yet, and ho begged to enclose a little account, which he trusted would meet with early attention on the part of my friend. This is the account—

£ s. d. To advice re Biunkum’s case... 0 6 8 Writing letter ... 0 6 8 Inquiries ... 1 1 0 £1 14 4 But that cheque has never started yet. Apropos of insolvency, a correspondent sends me a most amusing account in reference to the views of a reverend gentleman ho met at a friend’s house down South. The conversation turned on church matters, and the reverend complained sadly of the laches displayed by his'flock in the matter of subscriptions. “People show no interest,” said he, “in the cause, and donate very feebly. Why, there have been lots of men my way, who have gone through the Court lately, and not one of them gave anything to the church.” On the host remarking ho did not see “ how they could do so under the circumstances, he said, “ Why couldn’t they give * the cause ’ a good cheque the day before they filed ; it couldn’t hurt them, and would do 1 the cause’ good.” The originality of the idea may, perhaps, commend itself to some of your readers, though it must be confessed at first sight it does look rather like adding fraudulent bankruptcy to the list of sins Charity is supposed to cover.

Some years ago, I might say a good many years ago, when I was what they call here a “ cadet,” but what they called with better chosen nomenclature in South Australia “ a consignment,” the blacks in our parts were rather troublesome. Civilisation develops many tastes. It brought out their taste for mutton. It developed that taste in a high caste chief, by name Billy Buttons. Billy was caught sheep lifting red handed and run in. I was sorry for Billy, who was a mighty hunter, but I needn’t have troubled myself. In two days Billy broke out of the place where he was incarcerated, and sent back his handcuffs by a friend to the police with the remark that they were no use to him. lam reminded of this circumstance by a recent telegram from Gisborne. Mr Nahoware, a Maori, mizzled from gaol on account of the accommodation being insufficient. When the food and blankets are supplied on a more liberal scale, in fact in the style the Maoris have been used to for so many years, he promises to return. Ido admire this noble race. There’s such pride, such style about the Maoris. I could get tearful when I hear they are fading away like the setting sun. Do you think they will be very long on the fade ? Here is a real gem cut from the “Times” of May 22nd : “To philosophers and philanthropists of substantial means with no immediate kin. —A young gentleman, just nineteen, who feels he has very good natural abilities for a scholar, philosopher, and statesman, wishes to become acquainted with some one of the above who would adopt him, to give him every advantage to cultivate himself in a superior manner, and who would subsequently place him (after due knowledge and experience of his character and ability) in substantial independent circumstances, that ho may employ himself in promoting the well-being of his fellow-countrymen. Applicant is thoughtful, conscientious, energetic, persevering, methodical, cautious, modest, and very temperate. Address, to arrange for interview, H 792, Address and Inquiry Office, the ‘Times’ office, E. 0.” The advertisement would be good enough in itself without any comment of mine, but I cannot help thinking that is the sort of thing we may, with our present high-toned system of education, expect to see here before long. About the same date you will be losing money by your “ Wanted” column. I mean in respect of farm servants. And yet I don’t know, the beneath advertisement, cut from the columns of your contemporary, casts a now aspect on the question. “ Wanted, on a station or farm, by a person with colonial experience, a Situation to teach the various branches of a first-class English education, with French and Latin, and to fill up spare time in gardening, rough carpentry, wood chopping, or other useful work about the farm. Highest references. Address, stating wages, &c.” I must confess to a feeling of admiration for the advertiser. Ho means work without doubt, and with such varied accomplishments he ought to get it; but, I’m afraid, the majority of our young people who are being crammed with “a first-class English education, French, Latin,” and a host more accomplishments, will be too high-toned to combine the imparting of their knowledge with digging spuds in their employer’s garden. In fact, in twenty years’ time there won’t bo above two in a hundred would know how to plant a spud. In a recent local appearing in your columns there is a very amusing account of Mr Garrick examining a brewer’s traveller as to the amount and style of “ shouting,” considered necessary by such professionals when in pursuit of orders. The witness was an apt one, and went into the minutest details, He appears to have divulged to hie examiner the minutest arcana of the profession. It is an awful thing to think of, but surely Mr Garrick is not thinking of going into the line himself. Ho certainly would rut all the other knights of the road clean off it. The progress made by the present contractors with the Cathedral is, I should say most satisfactory to the citizens. I was inmj long-sustained character of inspector of pave ments and reviewer of buildings, looking al this ecclesiastical tenement, when a very tal friend of mine suggested I should climb uj and look over the palings. I’m not so youn; as I was, but I managed it, and the eight - saw well repaid the effort. The employes hat finished their lunch and were stretching ou the fleeting dinner hour by sparring. Twi stalwart youths were punching each other witl gloves, that are popularly supposed no to hurt, but which are eadly nocuous who) you get one on the nose and another 0) the eye. It was a conflict in which one o the combatants might truthfully' have said h was “ Impar congresses Aohilli,”as Josephu

says, and I feel sure Napoleon the one neve: prayed more devoutly for the advent o Grouchy than he did for the ringing of thi work bell. It rang at last, and breathles from the fray, and with a nose like a Germai sausage, he rushed with much emphasis ti yank stones to the summit of the building Tou can form no idea what an amount o sport you can see in Christchurch if you onl; know where to go and look for it. Now yoi know why those high palings wore put u round the close.

Do you like chess ? It’s a popular dissipation here, but might be made oven more so. I read recently an account of a match played in Germany, when the contestants, four in

number, had to drink a bottle of wine every time any player took a piece. The game was never played out, which under the circumstances is not to be wondered at; but I shouldn’t wonder wore the game made an eight-handed affair, the result would bo more auspicious. This novelty is well worth the attention of the Chess Club, and should it come off I’ll report the affair for you.