GOING TO PHILADELPHIA.

Globe, Volume VII, Issue 721, 11 October 1876, Page 3

GOING TO PHILADELPHIA.

(Banbury News.) Mr Samuel Simple concluded to visit the Centennial, and lately made his way to the depot, secured a ticket, and stepped on board a tnin that just then drew up at the platform. The car was empty, so he prognosticated a pleasant and uninterrupted journey. The train soon started up and then backed down on a side track and wai left there —it was the end of that train’s route. Mr S. ambulated back to the depot and took up his station on the platform to wait.

He did not wait long. His (?) train duly arrived ; he boarded it and with some difficulty found a seat, the car being quite crowded. The train started up and then backed down and switched off on another road, quite out of Mr S.’s route altogether. Mr S. rushed frantically out, made a desperate leap, and landed, not on his feet, nor on his head, nor anywhere else, nor did he stop when he landed. He went on as if he was in a terrible hurry. He threw away his travelling bag, cane, and hat, it being inconvenient to take them along. He made his way by turning somersets and handsprings, and did it in a manner that would reflect credit on a circus performer. He did not select his route very carefully, and consequently brought up against a telegraph pole. He was willing to stop, however, as he had already decorticated his shins from the knees down, smashed his nose, and a few other petty injuries, besides, as he afterwards observed, it was dangerous and exciting. He gathered himself up, recovered his hat, &c., which he had thrown aside in his haste, and once more placed himself in position on the platform to await the train.

He saw a train going out on a distant side track, and was informed on inquiry that that was his train. He said he’d get left after all if he wasn’t careful. Then he grabbed his baggage and “ lit out.” First on a slow, easy trot, then somewhat faster, and, as he saw the train gaining on him, he braced up and almost flew, determined to catch that train or break his neck. He stumbled and turned a hand-spring clear over one track, but was up and on again with renewed vigour. Then he put one foot under a rail, gave a spring and turned a series of revolutions, settling in a settling posture. But he was after the train and bad no time to lose sitting around. He pursued his course as though he was on an errand of life and death, and did catch the train as it was gliding out on to the main track, where it stopped and backed up to within ten feet from where he stood when he started in pursuit, and, as the conductor kindly informed him that it would remain there thirty minutes, he started out, purchased an accident insurance ticket, and resumed his seat to ruminate on the pleasures of travelling.