LITERATURE.

Globe, Volume V, Issue 573, 20 April 1876, Page 3

LITERATURE.

A VICTIM OF MODERN INVENTIONS

( Concluded.')

0 horror! I had caught up the wrong tube, and had been speaking to Miss Gradient. What should I do? 1 tried to explain, ‘My dear madam, I assure you it was alia mistake; I thought I was speaking to your brother.’ But I got no answer. ‘ Madam,’ I said, I do you hear me V Still no answer ; she had evidently put down the tube, and would hear nothing more I had to say. I put in the whistle, and dropped my end of the pipe, and threw myself back on bed to think.

The bare idea of my saying such a thing to that sHff old lady was awful to contemplate. How could I meet her at breakfast ? At last I determined I must wake up Harry, and explain mattery at once. I caught up the pipe, blew the whistle, and presently got an- answer. ‘ 01), 1 have made such a mistake,’ I said : ‘ 1 wanted you to come and sleep here, but I got hold of the tube that goes to Miss Gradient’s room, and asked her to come instead ; but of course I meant you all the time. Do come to me at once, or I shall try and find my way to your room.’

The reply only increased my horror and consternation ; it was a shrill female voice, not Miss Gradient’s, but evidentliy Jane the pretty housemaid’s. She said; ‘You wretch! I’d have you know as I’m a honest gal, and scorn ye. You won’t find me a-coming near you ; and if you come here, you can’t get in, for cook’s locked the door. ’

‘My dear girl, I assure you’ 1 commenced, trying to explain, but she began speaking from her end of the tube, and cut me short.

* I ain’t your dear gal; and it’s no use your talking any longer, ’cause I’m a-going tc plug up the pipe with curl-papers ; but I shall tell master all about it in the morning.’ I again threw myself back on the bed ; large drops of cold perspiration stood on my forehead, as I thought of the awful muddle I had got into. Sleep was not now to be expected, and I longed for a glimmer of light. If those confounded shutters had not been closed there would have been a little. Then I made up my mind that I would feel my way to the window, and try and open the shutters. I got out of bed and felt my way along the wall. The darkness and stillness were dreadful. Suddenly I heard a noise in the room, and started; the next instant I found it was the water running into the basin : I had trodden on the spring in the floor. I now proceeded, still feeling my way along the wall; I must come to the window in time. ‘ Mi, here it is,’ I muttered as I felt the curfains ; but I was mistaken ; it was the little bed in the recess. Again I journeyed onward, knocking my shins against the chairs, but at last I exclaimed : ‘ Here it is ; these are the curtains.’ It was a bow-window, and I passed through, to feel for the fastening of the shutters ; when How shall I describe my sensations! I screamed, I yelled, I scarcely knew what I did. It was the self-acting shower-bath I had got into, and the water came down in a torrent on my devoted head. I suppose my cries were deadened by the curtains for no one appeared to have heard me, and I emerged dripping from the bath. I was shivering. I drew off my wet night-shirt, and then felt my way to my portmanteau, and got another. This took me some time to accomplish, and I was glad to get into bed again. Strange to say, it was not long before I got warm ; a glow seemed to come over mo ; but sleep was still out of the question. Dining all this time I had never got over the oppression of the intense darkness. All at once I thought : ‘ Why, what a fool I am !’ I had forgotten how .easy it was to light the gas ; I had only to press on the ivory knob. True, there might bo some difficulty in finding it, but at anyrate I would try.

Again I felt my way along the wall, and at length finding the knob, I pushed it in ; but no gas was lighted. Instead, I heard a terrific noise overhead : it was the alarm bell. All the neighbourhood would be aroused. What should Ido ? I did not in the least know how to stop it. I must try and find my way to Harry. As to the pipe, 1 could not be at all sure which was number one in tiro dark. In my hurry to find the door, I had just upset a table with a variety of things upon it, when Harry, who had heard the bell, burst into the room at the instant of the crash, and exclaimed : * What on earth is the matter ?’

‘ Nothing,’ I cried. ‘lf I could hut stop this abominable bell ! I was trying to light the gas, and pushed in the wrong knob.’ ‘ There,’ said Harry, when he had felt his way in ; ‘ I’ve stepped it. Hut I must now mu down stairs to the telegraphs. I can hear the bells ringing; the neighbours have heard the alarm, ami are wanting to ask what is the matter and away went Harry, still leaving mo in the dark. When he had sent them each a message stating that the alarm was all a mistake, he came back to ask me how it happened, and lighted the gas for me.

‘1 could not sleep,’ I said, ‘ and wanted to got a light ; but unfortunately, 1 pressed in the wrong knob and set the bell ringing.’ ‘ Oh, well, never mind ; it’s all right now. But I must go and get into bed; I’ve got scarcely anything on, and my teeth are chattering so, I can hardly speak.’ ‘But, I say, I want to explain something to you. I’ve got into such an awful muddle. 1 wanted to speak to you ; but I got hold of th« wrong tube, and called to your sister instead, and she’

‘Oh, well, never mind; I’ll make it aU right in the morning. I can’t stay any longer now. ’ He was gene, and I had not been able to fully explain. Should I do so through the pipe ? No ; I would not risk that; perhaps 1 might get hold of the wrong one again, and only make matters worse. I lay pondering for a long time what I should do. I was seized with an ardent desire to get away. I looked at my watch : it was four o’clock ; why, it would soon be getting daylight. If those; confounded shatters wore but open, I should be able to sec if the day were breaking. Now, I had a light, surely I might open them. I would try. Yes, I could open them ; but as the gas was alight, it prevented the catch from keeping them open, and, as I have said, they closed with a spring; however, as I held them back, I could sec signs of the dawn, and at last managed to prop them open with two chairs. How could 1 get away ’—that was the allimportant question—and without Jane seeing me too. (Suppose I were trying to slip out, and were to meet her on the stairs in the dusk, she would probably think I had improper designs, and before I could explain, would rouse the house. Decidedly, if I meant to go, I must start before the servants were stirring. I consulted my Bradshaw', ami found that there w r as an early train from the station where I got out last night. Only last night V Could it be ? It seemed an age. Yes;’ I would make up my mind to go. I would leave a note for Harry, ask ing him to excuse my sudden departure, ami begging him, whatever might be alleged against my moral character, to suspend his judgment until he had heard what I had to say, if he should ever meet me again. I found in my pocket a note with a blank half-sheet; this I tore off, and writing my letter to Harry in pencil, I placed it on the dressing-table, and prepared to start. I bad only a small pormantcau, which I could easily carry to the station myself. Soon all was ready. I cautiously opened the door, and crept noiselessly down-stair*, carrying my boots in my hand. In the hall I sat down and put them on. Confound it; the front door was locked, and the key taken away. 1 must try some of the back entrances. I was determined to get out of the house if possible. 1 had not been in the kitchen, but I saw a passage which I had no doubt led in that direction. Cautiously I traversed it, for the early daylight was only dimly struggling in through the fanlight over the hall-door.

Presently I came to a pair of folding-doors covered with crimson baize. I pushed : they did not yield ; but peering more closely, I saw a latch by which they were secured. I tried it ; still the door would not open. There was another handle, and I put down my portmanteau to try this* when—‘ Oh! Oh ! Ah ! O-o-o o-o-o ! Murder ! Thieves ! Fire ! Oh !’ and so on, and so on, for about an hour, as it seemed to me, though I don’t suppose it was really a minute. I was caught in the thief-tray that Harry had explained to me, but which I had forgotten. My fingers clutched violently at the handles, though I was all the time most anxious to rush away from them ; but the muscles of my fingers were beyond my control, and I was suffering excruciating agony from the electric current, which was vibrating through me from head to foot. At last the shaking ceased, and with it my cries and shouts, which I had kept up vigorously all the time, and I almost dropped into a chair which stood near. Then I saw and heard Harry, who was asking me how I came there.

‘ I was going away,’ I gasped.’ ‘ I have been most miserable all nuht; but this is the climax ;it has almost killed me. Pray, open the door, and I’ll try and walk to the station. ’

‘Nonsense!’ cried Harry; ‘come along upstairs. lam very sorry you have been so bothered, but I’ll make it all right.’ ‘No; I shall never be happy here : you must let me go. lam very much obliged to you for your kind intentions; but what with tubes and bells, and knobs to push in, and handles to pull out, and batteries and coils, and one thing and another, lam almost driven out of my senses. Please, let mo go, or I shall miss the early train.’ ‘ At auyrate wait until 1 can call man my to put the horse in the dogcart, and I will drive you to the station—do, now. In the meantime, Jane shall come and get you some breakfast; I believe she is getting up.’ ‘No, no,’ I gasped ; ‘ I can’t wait for Jane. I will start at once; I must be gone before she comes down.’

‘ But I will call, and tell her to make ha de : I dare say she can come at once.’ ‘No, n> ! I must go at once. Good-bye. I am sorry to leave you so abruptly, but 1— I shall lose my train.’ ‘ Only stay two minutes, until I can slip on my clothes, and 1 will walk to the station with you then.’ ‘ No, no ; thank you. Good-bye, goodbye ;’ and 1 hastened away. But I had not gone far before I remembered that the electric wires were laid as far as the entrance gate, I looked back; Harry still stood at the door, looking after me. ‘ls there any danger at the gate ?’ 1 cried. ‘ Danger ! What do you mean ? There’s no danger.’ ‘ You are sure there are no knobs, or handles, or coils, or anything of that sort ?’ ‘Ohno ; nothing of the kind; you need not be at all afraid. I wish, though, you would alter your mind, and come back. ’ I looked back, and as I did so, I saw Jane opening the shutters; I shook my head, and cried : ‘No ; thank you ; good-bye :’ and made the best of my way down the drive. I cautiously pushed the gate open with ray foot, and carefully avoided touching the handle. When I got on the highroad, 1 breathed more freely, and hastened on to the railway station. 1 j ust managed to catch the early train ; and in due time reached London and my modest lodgings. As I entered my snug little room, I said to myself ; ‘ Thank goodness, there is no cellar full of electric batteries with wires, and shocks laid on all over the house; and as for lighting the gas, I had rather do it with the humble lucifer, than with the most convenient ivory knob that was ever invented.’