THE POLYGLOT PAPERS.

Gisborne Times, Volume XIX, Issue 1584, 14 October 1905, Page 3

THE POLYGLOT PAPERS.

[By Alpha.] A chiel’s among ye takin’ notes, An’ faith, he’ll print them.”

“There was a sound of revelry by night," Thursday night, and it was {political revelry, with nothing stronger than water on baud, and that water entirely monopolised by Mr Parliamentary Candidate Clayton, who seems to have'auch an inordinate affection for water, that, to be consistent, he should give up his neutral attitude anent prohibition, and decisively advocate the beverage he apparently loves sp well. Mr Clayton gave his maiden political speech in Gisborne to a fnll audience, and having well rehearsed his address in several little oentres beforehand, he was able to make a fair show as j a new aspirant for Parliamentary kudos But the candidate has much to learn, and much to unlearn before be becomes an effective politieal speaker either on the hustings or in Parliament, and with no inteation of giving anybody a free advertisement, yet it is simply an aot of oharity to intimate to Mr 0 and other budding orators,” that there is a rev. gentleman now in this town, who, I understand, is a past master in the art or arts of all-round oratory, and I would strongly recommend the speaker of Thursday night, and all others who wish to “ tread the boards,” to go in for a course of training under his auspices. '

Mr Clayton is a promising yonng man nevertheless, and when once he learns to think systematically and fluently express his thonghts, he will no doubt be a power in the land. Captain 'fucker characterised the speech as “ masterly,” bat that was a flattering exaggeration, to put it in the mildest form, and in this, as in all other things, biassed Bnd amateur criticism is not only misleading, bat injarioas to the speaker himself. The candidate certainly made some “ points,” but on the whole they were weakly made, and mnch marred by a (baiting delivery, vain and tiresome repetitions, want of force, and frequent, awkward appeals to the water glass. It was really qaite pathetic to observe the fatherly solicitude of His Worship the Mayor in keeping up the water Bapply for his thirsty protege. Mr Clayton is one of the thirstiest speakers I ever listened to. Still, if he perseveres in the practioe of the art, he will in time “ come out strong,” for he oertainly has talent, and only requires time, stndy, and praotice to develop it, These hints are offered in ..all kindliness, but if Mr Clayton should seek to interview me with either a bludgeon or a brickbat, I beg to inform him that stjoh interviews strictly belong to the province of the fight* iog editor.

Oar Shaw Day is fast approaohing, and very soon Gisborne will be in gala dress, and will smilingly disport itself in a gay, gala, good hnmor, wbilo bands are tooting, aod dags are flattering, and prize-winners rejoice, aod prize-bsers look glum, and everybody—no, not everybody, for, posts 1 has not the local Oonncil, with Czar-like, antooratio sternness, imperatively deoreed that everybody—meaning tbe people of course—shall have only ball a holiday ? Why is this thus ? Ye Mighty Magnates of tbe Municipal Forum, bursting with the grandeur of "a little brief authority, M what laiidable purpose is this decree of yours ] intended to serve ? Ye grant a fragment of a holiday that will be of no more worth as a season of enjoyment than the wiggle of a sick cat’s tail, for, hurrying home from work, pater will have to hustle into his Sunday-goto-meetings, and go diunerlosß, and mater bustle the “ ohilder ” into white frocks and curls, kid herself into a dragged-on best dress and blouse, and “ courting ” Jim in pulled on tweed overalls, will have to lug his hastily-attired, buxom Jemima, with bat and ribbons all awry, all footing it with panting, frantic speed to the festive scene, only in time to pay their money, hand in their tickets, give ono confused look at tho Show saturnalia, and then be obivied baok through tbe olosiDg gates “ as tbe twilight shadows fall.” And what of our country cousins, who have distances to bridge and rut-riven roads to negotiate. Arc they to be debarred from Show pleasures, and all tbe pleasing titillating excitements attendant thereon ? You are the City Fathers, then what sort of treatment is this to mete out to your civic children by preventing them from showing themselves at the Show ? If this paternal tyranny goes od, we will have to oonvene a wholesale family gathering to discuss the advisability of discarding your fatherbopd, and of installing a fresh batch of municipal parents who would show a truly paternal desire fpr their adopted civic children to attend the yearly Show. |The Mayor has proclaimed a publjc holiday for the Show ; the half-holiday proposal was the Holiday Committee’s idea, and was not approved of by the Council-1

Interesting, evon moro interesting than the 1 subject •of a Lysnae bvidgo. Agrioullar.il Shows,, in additional to their boiog sources of honoat enjoyment, are supposed to servo tho prinolpol purpose of being speoially odnoativo in re-, gard to the methods of rural and manuf lotnring industries, and the natnro and Yalno of different produots. All this is supposed to incroaso and consolidate a country’s industrial intorosta, to enlarge its rosonrooß, and so minister to tho general weal. But if tho people’s liberty to attend these displays is ourtailed, which are supposed to bo held in tho interests and for the benefit of tho people, then whore or what is the use of showing a show ? Who will yon show it to, and what will you show it for ? I give it up, the wbolo question is a bamboozler, and as I don't want to shorten my days by trying to untangle municipal problems, I relegate the whole question back to its congenial atmosphere of tho Oounoll chambers.

The new footway to tbo Kail! bridge is not only highly convenient both for adalls and obildren, bat it is already becoming a favorite trysfing plaoe for amottons swains and sensitive maidens, who are evidently touched in a tender spot by >

omming liitle Cupid, and who arc as’ evidently looking forward *o an aoquaintanoe with Hymen later on. Graceful figures and manly forms—in oouples of course—often adorn that footway, and boneath the " silvery moon” and roguishly twinkling stars, bright eyes aro suffused with a soft, dreamy, tender lovelight, the while he murmurs his passion into her willing ear, | and with his stalwart orm bent into a ] ourve, enoiroles her from the possible peril of inadvertently plumping over that red rail inlo the river. Bed! Why not pain! it green ? Ah me! Most of ns age-bent, bald-headed, roughly wrinkled, old wornout fogies have gone through that delight' fully painful and esquisitoly sweetly-bittoc experience of " Love’s Young Dream," and we can look with a pitying smile at these innocent, unsophisticated young neophytes in many things. Still, if tho Kaiti bridge footway should prove to bo the happy plighting grounds of-lives yet to be nobly lived, it will not have been built in vain