LANCE ITEMS.

Gisborne Times, Volume XVII, Issue 1359, 20 January 1905, Page 3

LANCE ITEMS.

Overcrowding is still prevalent in Wellington—except in the churches. A quaint epistle on a vital subject has been addressed to "the Resistor of Births, Marrißgss, and Deaths.” Tea is now adjudged to be not a temperance drink. But, you needn’t worry—the herb is net common in New Zealand. The bona fide traveller’s chances are looking up. He can now got tea at a pub. By-and Bye he may get tea with o, " stick ” in it.

A propos of Port Arthur, “ legs amputated to save their lives ” iB a recent newspaper headline. An amputated leg is better dead.

Three Australian doctors died through eating Christmas-gift turkoy. The deceased bird had been sent by train, in a closed box. The hot weather did the rest.

The most fashionable disease at present is “ bridgitis.” It is caused by over indnlgence in bridge, and is felt at the back of tno ears ohiefly. It loads to insanity and bankruptcy. A humorous Auckland tradesman reckons that the freak of ringing up certain ladies, in the name of a well-known doctor, was expensive at something under £SO. But look at the fun of it.

Eketabuna rejoices that it is three years since a bankruptcy was recorded in the district.

There are at present 16 patients in the Wellington Hospital suffering from scarlet fever.

Nicholas Mistrotes, a Greek doctor of law, pulled down the chandelier in his bedroom, Gower-street, .London, and, failing to pnsh it up again, was suffocated by the escaping gas.

Captain Edwin reported yesterday : “ Moderate to strong westerly wind 3 > glass rise ; tides moderate.”

Announcing her intention of entering the building trade, a young woman has joined the practical building class at the London Polytechnic.