Crackers!

Golden Bay Argus, Volume I, Issue 118, 25 September 1885, Page 3

Crackers!

Hallo, pard, what’s up? Crackers! Not fibs?

fil'd No, silly, tho Press never fib*

Crackers? Bon-mots, epigrams, enigmas

any tiling! Oh, I see. Going in onpo-i ion to Mr "Puff”, eh? Opposition, no! Pupil, that’s all. "Puff” is a good ma ter? Splendid. Terse, flippant, hum irons without being vulgar, satirical without being venomous. Come, that’s good. But you don't imagine that you can e h? ‘Nous verrons ee iju » nous verron \\ hat s all this about enlarging the harbor? Oh, nothing much. Present one rather too small lor them iii-boats to turn round. Aou .-ee, Her i.adysiu:) ’ never having been presented at Co in. and consequently not having studied the ‘retro'-gres iva step, sometimes treads on her skirt* when tiling to bow on, before an admiring audience. B.u I thought that steamers could describe a circle almost within Choir o>vn length? Snows your ignorance, my boy! Prorogation ! ! Members going home for the holidays! AAhat’s the average this term? Shocitingly had. Inspector reports tho school in a st;Ue of anarchy. Masters, incompetent; pupils, rebellious. Is of opinion that the electors should make a clean sweep, bays that some ot the ‘Dons’ can’t teach up to the Fourth Standard, and vet some ot the boys could almost matriculate. Can’t understand however such appointments eouid have been made. What do you think will he the finale? Ne sais pas. Would’nt be a had idea to import a few political ‘coaches’ from Sydney or Melbourne! History repeats itself! AN underfill ‘Patent dress-improver 1 Agency! Capital fashion. Made out of anything. Iron, steel, copper, candle boxes, birdcages or G. B. Argus-es. That’s rather good too! How do you kr.ow, not being ‘one of us’? Why, you see, twenty five years ago they were quite as much comme-il-faut as at present. In those days, being very young and very innocent, was allowed to go where now it would be criminal to enter and, —I’ve a good memory. Ha! ha! lia! Mind that wonderful memory of your’s does’nt get you imo trouble.

I n\ about tho Aorere bridge, is'nt it? What’s up now? Why, I hear its ‘up a tree’ with it! how, don’t. I know you're only trying to he satirical, because you are well aware that the Board are, and have been using their very utmost endeavours for the last I-don’t-know-how-inany months to bring thing:; to a crisis— and then the tenders will be out. When will that hr-? Ask us an easier one! A' kudavr Ghkfx.