MORE LIBERTY

Evening Post, Volume CXXIII, Issue 129, 2 June 1937, Page 16

MORE LIBERTY

MODERN CHILDREN

The exasperated mother is too apt to dismiss a child's irritability as naughtiness, states ran overseas writer. . ■■. "He only does it to annoy, because he knows it teases." Let us consider the child's point of view. At about 18 months, for the usual child he blooms into childhood and begins to feel a dawning sense of his own personality and power. He has .desires which often run counter to those of his parents. He wants to walk when they find it more convenient to carry him. He likes to feed'himself, even if it is a long and messy proceeding. He wants to stand up.and walk round his cot when ' his mother is ; equally determined that1 he'shall take a nap.

The result.is a constant conflict,between the sometimes angry parent and the ■ weaker child. ■ There is one thing in .this situation' which the parent cannot control, and that. is. crying. The child can • cry,; and • does cry, no matter how violently rhe Istold to stop.

This is the so-called negative period because the child1 has suddenly, learned the use of "No." He is-more than apt' to say "No" to almost anything that isasked of him. ■ ■ - .

"Have a, nice, cool drink of water," says the-mother. The'child says, "I don't want a- drink." Five, minutes later he demands' a drink. "Why didn't you take it when I offered it to you?" says his exasperated mother. "You just want to make work for me." \ No, that isn't the reason. '.;'

INDEPENDENT PERSONAUTJT.

'The child wanted to choose his own time-for'drinking. He wanted to feel that not his .mother's-.suggestions but his own desires were being followed. Not that the child 'thinks' this, out clearly, but he shows the course of his reasoning by his actions. He has been listening to "Noj no," for months, and, now he has ■ discovered that it is just as powerful a weapon for him as it is for his parents. He, too, can say "No," and his parents are helpless before it. ■.- ' ■ . :•■-•

When a child reaches this period— some Pearlier, some later than others— the parent must watch herself carefully to eliminate the useless "don't" and "no" from her commands.

Phrase them differently. Make them suggestions and let the child feel that he has made the choice himself. Let him exercise his newly : discovered sense of being an independent personality.

More liberty, is the answer to. the riddle. He is ■ still badly ■ adjusted to his new world if he has to express his personality by crying. Let him express it by harmless "doing." If he wants to. walk, let him walk. If he wants to turn on the living-room light, let him do it. Let him feed himself if he wants to, and, after all, why shouldn't he unbutton his own • buttons?

Thus we take away most of the irritations which lead him to cry and whine. ' "' '

Lieutenant-Commander B.'.- E. W. Logan has been appointed to H.M.S. Leander and lent to the New Zealand Division lor three years from April 30.

Mr. A. E. Hopper (Wellington) will be,staying in England for about four months combining business, with pleasure. He will go to Paris to see the Exhibition and spend two weeks before touring in France. On his return to the. Old Country most,of his time will be.spent in the South of England. .••...

Miss Margaret M. ■ Edwards (Wellington) has been staying at Brighton with her sister,, and , is ■ now/ . with Jtriet^giia jaiddlescx, ... -'---"-»<: