WHAT IS A GENTLEMAN?

Dunstan Times, Issue 1043, 14 April 1882, Page 3

WHAT IS A GENTLEMAN?

It is almost a definition of a gentleman to say he is one who never inflicts pain. This description is both refined and, as far as it goes, accurate. He is mainly occupied in. removing the obstacles which hinder the free and unembarrassed action of those about him ; and he concurs with their movements rather than take the initiative himself. His benefits may be considered as parallel to what are called comforts or convenience in arrangements of a personal nature ; like an easy chair or a good cigar, which do their part in dispelling care and fatigue, though nature provides means of rest and animal heat without them.

The true gentleman in like manner carefully avoids whatever may cause a jar or j 'lt in the minds of those with whom he is cast; all clashing of opinion, or collision of feeling, all restraint oi suspicion, or gloom, or resentment ; his great concern being to make everyone at their ease aud at homo. He has his eyes on all his company ; he is tender towards the bashful, gentle towards the distant, and merciful towards the absurb ; he guards against unseasonable allu sions or topics W'hich may initate ; he is seldom prominent in conversation, and never wearisome. He makes light of favors while he does them, and seems to be receiving when lie is conferring. He never speaks of himself except when compelled, never defends himself by a mere retort ; he has no ears for slander or gossip, is scrupulous in imputing motives to those who interfere with him, and interprets everything for the best. He is never mean or little in his disputus, never takes unfair advantage, never mistakes personalities or sharp sayings for arguments, or insinuates evil which he dares not say out. From a long-sighted prudence, he observes the maxim of the ancient sage, that we should conduct ourselves towards our enemy as if he were one day to he our friend. He has too much good sense to be affronted at insults, and is too well employed to remember injuries. He is patient, forbearing, and resigned, on philosophical principles. He submits to pain, because it is irreparable; to death, because it is his destiny. If he engages in controversy of any kind, his disciplined intellect preserves him from the blundering discourtesy of better, perhaps, but less educated minds, who, like blunt weapons, tear and hack instead of cutting clean, who mistake the point in argument, waste their strength on trifles, misconceive there adversary, and leave the question more involved than they find it. He may be right or wrong in his opinion, but he is too clear-headed to be unjust ; he is as simple as he is forcible, and as brief as he is decisive. Nowhere shall we find greater candour, consideration,’indulgence. He throws himself into the hands of his opponents, he accounts for their mistakes, he knows the weakness of human reason as well as its providenc and its limits. If he be an unbeliever, he will be too profound and large minded to ridicule religion or to act against it ; he is too wise to be a dog matist or tanatic in his infidelity. He respects piety and devotion ; he even supports institutions as venerable, beautiful and useful, to which he does not assent; he honours the ministers of religion, and it contents him to decline its mysteries without assailing or denouncing them. He is a friend of religions tolerationl and that, not only because his philosophy has taught him to look on all forms of faith with an impartial eye, hut also from tho gentleness of feeling, which is the attendant of civilisation.- -Newman-