Page 3 Advertisements Column 1

Daily Telegraph (Napier), 20 July 1883, Page 3

THE BAD BOY. HIS PA "SALTS" THE MINISTER. " Say, I thought you Avas going to try to lead a different life, said tho grocery man to the bad boy, as the youth came in Avith his pockets full of angle Avorms, andAvanted to borrow a baking powder can to put them into, Avhile ho Avcnt fishing, and ho hold a long angle avoiiu up by tho tail and let it wriggle"" so it frightened a girl that had come in after two cents worth of yeast, so she dropped her pitcher and Aveut out of the grocery as though she avms chased by an anaconda. " I am going to lead a different life, but a boy can't change his whole course of life in a minute, can lie P Grown personns have to go on probation for six months, before they can lead a different life, and half the time they lose their cud before the six months expire, and have to commence again. When it is so alfired hard for a man that is endowed Avith sense to break off boing bad, you shouldn't expect too much front a boy. But lan doing as Avell as could be expected. I a hit half as bad as I avus. Gosh, Avhy don't you burn a rag. That yeast that the girl spilled on the floor, smells like it Avas sick. 1 should think that broad that Avas raised Avith that yeast Avould smell like this cooking butter you sell to hired girls." "AVell, never you mind the cooking butter. I know my business. If people want to use poor butter Avhen they have company, and then bloAv up tho grocer before folks, I can stand it if they can. But what is this I hear about your pa fighting a duel with a minister in your back yard, and wounding him. in the leg, and then trying to drown himself in the cistern ? One of your new neighbors Avas in here this morning and told me there avms murder in the air at your house hist night, and they were going to luia'c the police pull your place as a disorderly house, I think you were at the bottom of tho Avholo business ■'" "0, it's all a darn lie, and those neighbors Avill find they better keep still about us, or avc will lie about them a little. You see, since pa got the blacking on his face ho don't go out any, and to make it pleasant for hint ma invited in a fcAvfriends to spend the evening. Ma has got up and around and the baby is a daisy, only it smells like a goat, on account of drinking the goat's milk. Ma invited the minister, among tho rest, and after supper the men Avcnt up into pa's library to talk. 0, you think I am bad, don't you, but of the nine men at our house last night, I am an angel compared with what they were Avhen they were boys. I got into the bath-room to untangle my fish line, and it is next to pa's room, and I could hear everything thoy said, but I Avcnt away 'catt'so I thought tho conversation would hurt my morals. They Avould all steal, when they.AVerc boys, but darned if I ever stole. Pa has stole over a hundred Avaggonloads of water-melons, one deacon used to rob orchards, another one shot tame ducks belonging to a farmer, and another tipped over grindstones in front of tho village store at night, and broke them, and rim ; another used to steal eggs, and go out in tho woods to boil them, and the minister Avas the worst of tho lot, cause he took a seine, with some other boys, and went to a stream where a neighbor was raising brook trout, and cleaned tho stream out, and to ward off suspicion, he went to tho man jiext day and paid him a dollar to let him '