KHAKI JOKES

Dominion, Volume 10, Issue 2896, 7 October 1916, Page 10

KHAKI JOKES

SIGNALLERS AND FATIGUES WET AND DRY A detachment of nine signallers in chargo of a sergeant arrived at a New Zealand transport in Wellington soino hours "uefore the time ol' sailing. It happened that the embarkation officer was short of men l'or fatigues, and after the signallers had piled- their kits on the dock, he asked the sergeant if ho could sparo two men to stand guard over the kits and at one of the hatches. "Sorry, sir," the sergeant said, stiffly, _ "but the Signallers never do fatigues." i -iou are ou /active service now, sergeant. I want two men to stand guard." "King's regulations, .sir" —he quoted the section and clause—"Signallers never do fatigues. 1 regret I cannot obey you." The_ officer was tactful. He laid a friendly hand on the sergeant's shouland said: '" r Sergean6/ we are in a hole for want of msn Tor fatigues. AVon't you help us out?'' ; 'Sir,~ said tho sergeant, "the Signallers are at your service." PLENTY OF WET. A carriage-loau of happy soldiers were speeaing into Wellington on afternoon and evening leave. AVhen they left Trentham it was ruining, but when Petone had been passed the sun shone, and an observant man remarked that the Hutt Road was quite dry. "It hasn't been raining here," said the soldier. ' "Not raining," exclaimed another man. "Don't, tell mo it's going to be fine in town, and me in my old boots and putties. By jove, the road is dry, isn't it?"

"Cheer up," remarked a comrade', waving a hand towards Somes Island, "thcro's a dickens of a lot of wet on this side, old mail.". ,

THE LITTLE .ORDERLY, In a certain department St. Trentliam Gamp there is a very tall, officer and a very short, orderly. Recently a sergeant-major was handing«out railway passes to the men. A number of officers were in the orderly-room, which was crowded, including the tall one. •"When .the little orderly's«> name was called, he said: ' "Here, sergeant-major!" "Where?" demanded tlio sergeantmajor. "I can't, see you." . "I'm behind Mr. , sir, 1 ' tho small voice couliiiued, and amid an outburst-, of laughter tho tall ,officer moved, and disclosed the'little orderly! "That's all right," the sergeantmajor said, as he handed him his pass, "always sitig otil, and you'll never get IBst." ■ LIGHT WINE. Private Blade, of the Reinforcements, and Rifleman Point, of tho' Square Dinkums, were doing themselves well. As a change from the solid, satisfying, healthy camp food, they were about to dine at one of Wellington's best hotels. An attentive waiter brought.them a wine list. "Must have some wine," said Private Blade. "Sorry, sir, but the only still wine we have is port." "Ah," said Blade, studying' the list —lie hadn't the'least idea what still wine was—"Alt', I see, well— 1 —" Rifleman Point came to the fescue. n ßring us," Tie ordered, "bring us some restless wine, waiter, as restless as possible."