SCOTCH PITHINESS.

Dominion, Volume 6, Issue 1756, 22 May 1913, Page 6

SCOTCH PITHINESS.

IN WORD & PHRASE,

SIDELIGHTS BY REV. J. GIBSON SMITH. "You can pack more meaning into ono word of Scotch 'than you can into a whole page of English," said the Rev. J. Gibsoil Smith, in referring to "The Pithiness of Scottish Speech" at the Scottish Society's concert last evening, and he proceeded to provo it by illustrations ill a manner which kept his Caledonian friends gurgling with laughter. Taking •single vrords as an example, Ihe speaker said tha't, when ho was a boy, it was tho delight of his playmates and himself to play in the vicinity of a spot wliero a road was spanned by a low railway bridge not much higher than their heads, and, when they saw a train coming, they ran to get underneath the bridge to hear (ho roar, rush, and clatter of the passing train. lu such«a case the cry of the lad who first saw the train was—"Lads, cam and get a dirl!" And whero could ono find such a word of meaning as in the word "yon"—a v.-ord_ that was used toexpress many things with equal satisfaction. The speaker remembered two Scotchmen meeting in a railway train, and, after a worm greeting, one said to 'the other— '"{'am. d've mind yon?" .Tock replied— "Ay, I mind yon!" and they both burst into roars of laughter. Tho speaker did not know what on earth "yon" meant in that case, but they did. Another illustration of the point which a Scotchman can make in one word was by a story of two farm servants, who, in tho absence of tho mas'tcr. were together in the kitchen. Suddenly they hcanPa noire, and, thinking that it was the marftr, Jean thrust Tam under the visitors, however, proved to be two other servants from a no:ghl>ouring farm, who, after n time, sat themselves on the tench which was none too strong. Gradually u l>e?an to sag—sag until poor Jam underneath was forced to take its weight, and as there was n three-cornered piece of iron under one of his knees ono could best imagine tho awkwardness —not to mention the pain of humiliation —<u his po->'ion. For a time "Tam" stood it, then imrling it too much for human flesh a n 1 blood to stand, he let out a broad "Gosh!" "If he hadn't been a Scotchman he couldn't have found a word to express the state of his mind so lucidly,' sa ! d Mr. Smith.

But it was not only in single words that tli? Scotchman was pi thy. Some of his phras:s were very brief and cxprsssiva. Moffat was a railway terminus where there were buffers to keep the_ train fror.t leaving tho track, just as is tho cas> at Te Aro. One day an old woman of another station asked tho stationmaster:

"Does the train stop at Moft'nt?" "If it disna'," replied tho officer, "ye'll get an awfu' dird!"

In a school tho master was examining ths hoys in tho meaning of certain words. After explaining that "granivorous" meant a grain-eating animal, ho asked \ihat would an animal be called which ate flesh, and at once tho answer came, "Carnivorous." Then seeking to know if any boy knew the meaning of the word "omnivorous." he asked: "What would an animal be that ate anything?" .To tho schoolmaster's amazement one boy spoko up, and said, "A gutsy brute I"

Pithiness in phrase was illustrated by another story, admirably told by Mr. Smith. It was about a Lady Scott (not her real name), who, the speaker said, was liko an old-time lady who made a hobby of teachine mothers how to rear their children. Tho Lady Scott in question was the mother of a family, but it was rather notorious how she neglected thKii in order to go round lecturing. She had another woman whoso duty it was to beat up audiences for her ladyship, and on olio occasion this woman approached a labourer's wife with the usual request, and on being rather coolly received, plied her with argument as to what she would learn as a mother. "D'yo call that Ladv Scott a mitbor?" said tlio guidwifc. "Sho's nao mitlier at a'—she's an incubator!"