QUIPS AND QUIDDITIES.

Cromwell Argus, Volume III, Issue 127, 16 April 1872, Page 5

QUIPS AND QUIDDITIES.

F. V MOLE SKI X. Advice to g.iml)lers : don't play—the fool. A watery complaint.—A murmurim; stream. Innuoderate smokers should be called 'bacca--1 nals. A lady's chignon has hcen compared to an h : sI torical novel : fiction founded un fact. There is this difference between a man in the | last depths of despair, and a goose : the one gives up ; the other gives down. The schoolboy whoa ! Latin translation of ma- \ hogany was m, us jxrrcus ft <;/<>, (my hog and I.) | did not obtain a piize, as anticipated. ■; Not Ion» since, in America, a lady was ad- . j inittcd into the medical profession, whose ChrisIt ian names were Charlotte Ann. How excecdj ingly unfoitunatc a coincidence ! The fair phy- \ sician stands a self-convicted charlatan. A man is mostly tried before being hung. A bell, on the contrary, is generally hung before it can be tried. Ucspecting the bell at Cromwell, ' it appears that there lias been a suspension of the ! Habeas Corpus Act. When is it to be tried? By a late mail from I'm gland., it will lie seen ' that hints have been thrown out by the repub- ' licans of Southwark that Mr Odger, instead ot' -boldly " tig'htng for a republic," has shown -symptoms of desertion from that cause. A de-.-1 scrtcr from the r.rilish army was usually branded 1 : with, aP. The same letter mi lit bo used as a J stigma, in chastening Mr Odger. It might be D I made a pielix to his surname, lie would thus j j be known as the Dodger. s j " Viator"' is quite right as regards quartz-mhi-aiin '. Scientific instruction is very necessary, if only for the sake of inculcating a comprehension of the geological terms and misty theories now ia vogue. Dislocation of the jaw is not the only " ! thing to be feared. For, without being very ob--0 ! tuso, a man might in a lit of mental hopelessness i T so comport himself, in endeavouring to under- *" j stand what lie reads, as to furnish his friends ': with sufficient cause for seeing him placed under it restraint,—they having discovered him iu the iv suicidal act of cudgelling his brains, it Pleasurable emotions, no doubt, filled the is breasts of the sly grog-sellers of this distiict at n the result of a late charge, brought against one -j of their fraternity. Unless thin,s arc altered, : " Put water in your grog" w ill become a shantykeeper's synonym for 'Tut money in thy purse.'' So long as mineis make fouls of their ~J purses, so long w"il sly grog-sellers look upon ,-.. | fools as their purse. A halfpenny's worth of .. c liquid, liquidated with sixpence! Verily di-gcra 0- | are "inferior an : m.ils," n- i " And w ill ;is tenderly be led by the nose," ■ I As asses are."