IF YOUR HONOUR PLEASES

Press, Volume CV, Issue 31001, 5 March 1966, Page 14

IF YOUR HONOUR PLEASES

I By

WHIM WHAM]

“Does the wearing of wigs and gowns by judges and counsel contribute to the cause of justice—or is the reverse the case?’’—the Attorney-General, Mr Hanan, to the Federation of Justices of the Peace Associations. My Learned Friend looks twice as big And Learned, in his Gown and Wig. He’d look plain Silly in that Sort Of Fancy Dress OUTSIDE the Court. INSIDE, where legal Rituals rule, He is secure from Ridicule. His Honour the Queen’s Judge, likewise, Looks larger than his actual Size: His faintest Smile, his lightest Frown Gets Grandeur from the Wig and Gown; His feeblest Quip, or stalest Joke Is greeted like a Masterstroke, Clerks and Reporters treasure it, Praising his legendary Wit, Embalmed, as other Dull Things are, In the drab Folklore of the Bar What else but Wig and Gown lends Brightness To sober Sense or solemn Triteness? They’re Anything but bright, I know, But help the Wearers to SEEM so I’ve known Professors, too, who sound Far less impressive when ungowned. Yet even Reformers will allow, Justice must dress the Part somehow. Just try imagining the Courts WITHOUT a Uniform of Sorts! When All assume the same Disguise, All equally at least LOOK wise. The well-groomed Q.C. won’t impress The Jury by his Taste in Dress, While bald and scruffy Mr Plea Is heeded Less than he should be, Sir, give me Justice in a Wig! I’ll recognise It in that Rig.