MACKINDER'S GODDAMA.

Press, Volume LX, Issue 11502, 7 February 1903, Page 4

MACKINDER'S GODDAMA.

"This climate," grumbled his Hononr, "is only fit for Japanese and Kaaaka-i." He 1 end the menu, and thrust it into a bouquet of orchids in front, of him- "Jerue-Uem artirfhokes!" he remarked, ca-xtankercmaly.

"Now, in the name'of cota_non-sense, why Jcrusa-tem artichokes?" The A.D.C. coo-s-'idered, looking appealingly the while at the lazy punkah, flapping to and fro above him. "It might be," he said, thoughtfully, "because they make Palestine soup." His Honour turned upon him a look of compassionate contempt. "The trend of modern conversation," he remarked to the steward at his e-toow, "ist towards positive insanity. Nobody can talk nowadays; as for the raconteur, he is obsolete!" "My dear Judge," said the A.D.C., "do have a paw-paw; they are good for dyspepsia. The P.M. from GeraJdtown told me this morning tlie very best snake yarn I ever heard-"

"Snake yarn!" exclaimed his Honour, with sudden interest, "why I could tell you "He swung round "in his chair. "'Come up on deck," he said, invitingly. The A.D.C. stepped out and followed him, sinking into a deck chair with hie customary air of bored interest. His Honour fanned himself violently with a palm leaf. Far on shore lay the Queen of the North in a silky haze of moonlight, sleeping among her palms and roses, aiid bougainvillia. The wind brought off sudden breaths of perfume, and the little waves slapped the side with a sound of dreamy content as the great ship lteaved on tlie tideway. "Lovely night," remarked his Honour. "Pity one can't see it from an ice-chamber. Weather like this makes me doubt the Constitution; I want to be a Satrap, and go about with a retinue of slaves—litter, fans, and all that."

The A.D.C put his thumbs in his scarlet cummerbund. "And how about the snake yarn?" he said. •'Snake yarn!" exclaimed his Honour, with an air of gentle astonishment, "how did you know I had a enake yarn?" "Because you always like to go one •better," replied"the A.D.C. "The P.M.i was true." _

"If he said so," remarked his Honour, cheerfully, "you may set it down as a lie, sure; now mine is true —you may acquire merit hy believing it. Did you ever hear of Mackinder, tho man who wrote 'Snakes, and other Reptiles?' You have? Weil, this story is about Mackinder. He brought a letter of introduction to me when he came out to visit his brother—l never liked anyone so well —he was no end of good fellow, but queer's no word for it. A Glasgow man, as you know, six feet two in his stockings, within naming red head, and shortsighted light blue eyes behind his glasses. He stooped, and had an odd habit of thrusting out his neck, which gave him tlie appearance of some enormous bird, and tho loose silk coat he. wore, with the pockets buf.ging with creatures of sorts, -assisted considerably in the similitude- People took to him tremendously, but they had a wholesome horror of his pockets—one never knew.wjiat he might produce from them. He used to go off into the bush, and make long expeditions into the New Guinea scrub in search of snakes;, snakes were his partioular hobby, and. he wouiid meet one in the street, ©r at the club, and yank several yards of serpent out of his pocket, or maybe something small and deadly as prussic acid, and remark, 'I say, old man, do look at this 1 Splendid specimen—such and such a snake —very rare!' and go on to tell you how long it took to die from the bite of it. How he wasn't killed in those journeyings he took I, never can understand; he went unarmed, save for a rook rifle, and nobody with him but hia assistant Forbes. Forbes was an old college friend of his; brillia-itly olever chap, who had taken honours, and drifted into poverty and disgrace through being altogether given over to drink. He was practically never sober, though Mac-rinder used to watch him like a baby. Mackinder had ft igrea-t sympaithy for failures, and might-have-beens, and his hand was never out of his [pocket. He was a queer thing in scientists.

"One night at Government House I saw Paget knock up against him, and something hissed from his breast-pocket. . 'Hallo!' cried Paget; 'what's that? Suxely you have got a snake aoout you, Mackinder?' i "ilackinder blushed the colour of brick- | dust, and putting his hand inside his J dress coat brought out a thin black velvety body with a pink belly and a flat venomous head; it waved the head about for a moment, and disappeared up his sleeve. " JThat'B my Goddama,' ha said, with his curiously boyisih kugh. 'I have carried it about with me since it was about an inch long. The man who gave it me declared its presence would bestow immunity from snake bite. It has done so. Why, bow", I cannot tell. Fascinating things, snakes.' # ' '"By Jove! 1 said Paget sbuddenngly, 'I'd rather purchase wisdom with a jaacket of ov& n, i.ypoc?enr-ic syringe than carry about a beastly snake.' "'Serpents are like people,' said Mackinder; 'they require knowing. Let me lend yom a couple; you'll be surprised at their individuality, onoe you are acquainted with them." _, '"Thanks, awfully,' replied Paget. 'I have no desire to extend my undesirable acquaintance oeyond myself." "Mackinder smiled .as he* went off with his Goddama up his sleeve, and it made me fairly creep to see him dancing with his niece. The girls adored Mackiader; they thought it no end of fun to tell him they had kept him a dance, though he. danced like a lame camel; but their enjoyment came off in seeing him blush and smile, and in listening to his stories:

"Forbes was there, too, moping gloomily about the verandahs. He told me Mackinder had made him swear off the .drink, for a fortnight, and wouldn't leave him at the hotel for fear of temptation. He declared he was simply craving for a drink, but somehow Mackinder headed him off every time he got near the refreshmentroom. "Perhaps that accounted for the subsequent proceedings. Forbes somehow got it, and when I sauntered into w»e club he was wandering up and down the bdlliardroom laughing at the pictures, and drunk as a. crow. He refused to go home, saying Mackinder had taken his nieces up to their house, and they had made him leave the Goddama, behind. He was waiting to render it up, and evidently anxious to resign possession. I sat np on the verandah till I heard a great noise in the bar, and went down to find Forbes sitting on the icechest wavingthe Goddama above his head. There was a crowd of members from across

the road; they had an all-night sitting on-

"Mackinder and Forbes were on the outside, and Mackinder was craning his long nrck to see what his assistant was doing. Fprbes caught sight of him peering over the heads of the crowd, and sHouted, 'Come and take ye're Goddama.* He began jabbing it up and down in the air, while the creature made ineffective darts at his wrist. •I'm parfait seek p't.' And he laughed foolishly as Mackinder came up, looking very pale, and tried to take it from him. 'Don't ye know what ye're doin* Forbes?' he said" very low. 'Courting death; let j_o, you fool*!' Forbes thrust it into -u.ackinder's face with another of his silly laughs, and the next instant he had sprung clean six feet ac.099 the floor with the snake hanging on to his forefinger. Mackinder stepped back holding a handkerchief to his mouth, and sat down stiffly ; his face was quite grey, and his eyes looked glazed. "Tor God's sake,' he said thickly, "a

doctor! a doctor I' and he closed his eyes. 'Quick, quick!' he said; 'no time to lose!' •""We took hold of Forbes, who was screaming like a woman, and carried him off to Tallier, who gave him an injection of strychnine; but apparently it was to<> late. " Forbes died in the usual way. and -vve went back to break it to Mackinder. He mis still sitting in the same place, huddled up against the wall. I shook him, but he made no sign. Then Paget liftei his head, and we saw that he was a dead man; his mouth was slightly puffed, and in the middle of the lower lip was a small slipper-shaped mark, where the snake had bitten him- as Forbes thrust it in his face. "Of course it had exhausted the venom in the poison tangs; Forbes had died «f ilir linrtwlM 11 h I «_a