NEW CABIN PLANNED

Bay of Plenty Beacon, Volume 10, Issue 34, 7 October 1946, Page 5

NEW CABIN PLANNED

WHAT ANOTHER !

’UT HABIT TAKES ROOT

(By foo-hoo)

The ’abit (pardon, habit- of planting mysterious little huts on the vacant lot at the end of the Strand has taken a feverish grip of the local National Party Branch. In the past few days another has sprung up, completely mystifying the public and causing wild excitement among Mr Holland’s supporters.

The tale of this, the second ’ut is even more thrilling and exciting than the first. We present it in Buck Rogers fashion straight from the pen of Yoo-hoo who is responsible for all our inside and outside scoops. The plot runs thus:—

Deep in a dark and dripping cavern reached, by a secret tunnel leading through one of the Borough water mains, seven cloaked and hooded figures whisper conspiratively. Yoo-hoo, similarly clad, enters unnoticed and picking up a spare hand, raises the stakes and scoops the pool with a pair of twos. The leader flings down his hand. “I,” he says aggressively, “am the local branch of the National Party.” The others move belligerently. “All right, all right,” murmers the leader placatingly. “I meant you six, too.” (Fortunately for Yoo-hoO he does not stop to count those present). “We have a terrible problem before us,” he continues. “Our Maori brethren wish to use our ’ut to cook a hangi on election day with which to serve and poison Labour supporters. I myself have the arsenic right here. Anyone like to try some?” (Nobody liked). “This,” he continued in menacing tones, “leaves us pakehas without a headquarters in which to throw our party.” “What party?” inquired one of the hooded figures. “The National Party of course you great big handsome man you” (or words to that effect) thundered the leader. . 7

. “We must,” he continued, stepping up on to a handy soap-box, “we must erect another. I have one in mind right now. It will make an excellent hideout. You, No. 5, will see to it immediately.” “Whoops!” said No. 5 mounting his tricycle and pedalling furiously round the room. “Open the trapdoor.”

The leader pressed a button. A trapdoor opened. A rush of water flooded in.

“Call in to the Borough Engineer on the way,” he said to No. 5 “and tell him his water main is leaking again. No. 5 vanished through the deluge, closely followed by Yoo-hoo who had seen enough, heard enough, and had enough. The night is the next one. Deep in a dark and dripping cavern reached by a secret tunnel leading through one of the Borough water mains, seven cloaked and hooded figures plus one in a dressing gown whisper conspiratively.' 'ifoo-hoo, similarly clad (in cloak and hood) enters unnoticed, and picking up a spare hand, raises the stakes and scoops the pool with a pair of twos. The leader flings down his hand.. “We eight” he says cautiously watching No. 2 grasping a blackjack in one hand “are the local branch of the Labour Party.” (Fortunately for Yoo-hoo no count is taken). “When am I going to get my cloak and hood?” asks the one in a dressing gbwn. .

“All in good time.” “If I don’t get it soon, I’ll write to the Minister” threatens Dressing Gown.

“All right then, write to the Minister. Perhaps he’ll lend you his,” says the leader sarcastically. “Now to business. First we have the accounts for payment. We owe 14/8 to the National Party for hire of cavern, cloaks and hoods. Capitalists, that’s what they are. I move we don’t pay. All in favour say aye carried.”

“Now then, glancing through the Nationhl Party minute book I find they intend (1) to poison us with arsenic hangi, (2) to erect another hut. What- measures shall we take to counteract these?”

Deep silence reigns. No. 4 tries to squirt No. 1 across the cavern with ink from his fountain pen. “I have it,” says No. 6. “Got a permit for it?” absently inquires the leader. “No, no, I mean the solution.” “Oh!” says the leader. “Fire ahead.” “Well,” says No. 6. First . . .” “Never mind” chips in the leader. “I’ve got a better idea. (1) every Labour supporter will be issued under Social Security with a bottle of emetic sauce to eat with his hangi and (2) let’s spread the rumour thatthe new hut which I understand is so much nicer than the other, is

ours. All in favour say aye carried any further business meeting closed my parole only lasts until 2.7 a.m. Goodbye.” No. 3 collects the cloaks and hoods, all except that of Yoodioo, who swims quietly out through thetrapdoor with yet another sensational story.