FORTHCOMING ENCOUNTER

Bay of Plenty Beacon, Volume 70, Issue 91, 18 July 1944, Page 5

FORTHCOMING ENCOUNTER

STOCK AGENTS v CARRIERS

REVIEW OF HAIRY FAIRY FORM

Contrary to expectations the Hairy Fairies have at last decided to remain no longer in insincere obscurity. With confidence and selfesteem they have placed in the ruthless hands of the press a selection of their representatives for indiscriminate public perusal. With considerable pride we present the following revieAV of Hairy Fairy Form. Apparently some of those selected are rather doubtful starters but will be definitely lending their moral and vocal if not their physical support. In the review which was handed to us, it is stated that the Hairy Faries have a fairly light pack. This should indeed put. hope into the hearts of the Hilly Billies as, by all appearances, the Hairy Fairy forwards should average out at no' more than 16 stone apiece. It is also stated that the pack is fast breaking (let us hope they will not crack under the strain), and loose; a case for the clergy whom, we hope, will soon save them and put them back on the straight and narrow path. Among the forwards we find the name of Herb Brabant. We hear that in accordance with his training and experience in overseas battle areas he is to use " gorilla" tactics, and take on the Hilly-Billies willynilly. Keith Brabant is also lined up in the front row, if a case of refreshments is placed at their opponent's end of the field the brothers will no doubt startle the spectators with a dazzling exhibition of a dual rush. Peter and Tat Anderson,, are two Hairy hopes, while Harry Ruff (emulating his title) is planning to startle the Hilly Billies into submission by a hypnotic display of foaming ferociousness. It is stated that the. backs have lots of speed and dash. In between times they intend to "speed" away and "dash" into the nearest milk bar. (Confidentially if Ron Harris goes as fast as he did the day Jim Delves was behind him no Hilly-Bil* ly will even get within yodelling distance of him).

Although threats and evil incantations have no place in our columns, we feel it. is our duty to warn that monarch. of bottle and glass, Roger Corcoran, of an impending catastrophe. His first duty, to himself ,is to steer dear of the ball which is usually the spot where physical disabilities are inflicted. His second is to steer clear of Jack Bridgeman. It is muttered in Hairy Fairy circles that if Jack gets "Corks" in a scrum while the ref (if there is any ref, left by that time) is looking the other way the public should be staggered by the changed appearance of the star Hilly Billy. "Corks" has one consolation. Being a wild West Coaster, JacJi* Bridgeman will have a constant "toist." and consequently will probably need many revivers from the popular little bottle wielded so capably by the St. John officers. This should give "Corks" time to get a good start.

Merv Cummings is looking forward to the match. We hear that his son and heir will be on the sideline to cheer him along and he, wants to appear as a veritable giant on the field.

The three-quarter line should be solid with Arthur Hall and Rube Mercer on the wings while Ernie Currah should look imposing at , centre. Nugget Freeman will be half back (although he would probably prefer to be 'left out') while Walter Semmens has arranged with himself to play full-back. He mistook,, we understand, the word 'fullback' for 'fool-back' and applied for e the position immediately.

Bob Woolliams and Sid Mahy are listed as being a slippery pair of five-eighths. By the way the coal dust, clings, we rather imagined Mr Woolliams to be more the sticky type. Sid Mahy should do much with his penetrating gaze.

Denny Giles is another Hairy horror. With his sardonic sense of humour he should do much to rattle the Hillies with well rounded verbal volleys. His glance, which contains venom and. concentrated fury mixed in equal proportions should' do much to make the knees of the. Hillies turn to jelly and chill their feet somewhat.

■- Jack Stewart is classed as the fairiest Hairy, or alternatively the hairiest Fairy in the outfit. Rumour has it that he is ready to fight at the drop of a hat, especially a Hilly Billic's hat. From the rear he is apt to present a 'stern' appearance. That will probably be the. only way the Hillies will see him. Instead of endeavouring to break through the opposing pack Jack intends using the famous calF of the' truck driver to the motorist in front —"Get out of the way you !" This is known as the Call of the Wild., and should be more than sufficient to intimidate the. Hilly Billies. If Jack Stewart does this, we

hear that the, Hilly Billies intend to retaliate by warbling /the "Cowboys Love Song" with the intention of soothing the Hairy Fairies off to sleep while they score a few t'rys.

Quite a few of the truck boys regard this game as an opportunity to settle old scores with the. Hilly Billies, so no doubt the knights o£; St. John be well to the fore? during the course of the match.

The'-Hairy Fairies team will be selected; from the following: R. Harris; TV 1 Simpson; M. Cummings; J. Stewart; J. ' Bridgeman; D. Giles; P. Laurie; R. Ulph; Tat Anderson; Peter Anderson; Theo Anderson (Taneatua); Theo Anderson (Edgecumbe); Bluett; S. Mahy; H. Ruff; H. Brabant; K. Brabant; A. Hall; E. Biillot; R. Benseman; O. Br'.dger; J. Larmer; L. Rawson; W. Hooper; R. Hunter; R. Woolliams? L. Martin; S. Flint; I. Rimmer; G. Lovell; £. CurrahjW. Semmens; P. Fer.ton; R. Mercer; L, Freeman; N. Semmens and F. Hara* _ wira.