Local and General

Bay of Plenty Beacon, Volume 2, Issue 133, 8 March 1940, Page 4

Local and General

Short Sitting. The sitting of the Magistrate's Court on Wednesday commenced promptly at 10 a.m. There were no cases of a serious nature to be heard and after the shortest session in Whakatane for some months the Court rose at noon. Aid to Funds. A Bridge Afternoon was held at Mrs F. J. Appleby's residence, Domain Road, on Wednesday in aid of the Red Cross funds. A* delightful afternoon was spent by the many ladies present and a sum of over £2 was raised. Successful Function. Credit is due to the Red Cross committee and helpers who so ably presented the Welcome Home to Leading-Seaman McGougan in the Taneatua Hall on Tuesday night. It says much that such a successful function was organised at short notice. Paper Chase. Reminiscent of the school paperchase days was the sight of a long trail of paper scraps on the Hillcrest Road yesterday afternoon. The traiil could be followed to the end of George Street but a fairly strong freeze gave the minute wafers no chance and they had almost entirely disappeared by evening. Why Germany Lost Last War. A Nazi teacher asked the class what were the causes of the German defeat in the last war. No one could say until a little Jewish boy answered: "It was because of the Jewish generals." The teacher replied: "Yes, the Jews had much to do with our defeat. But we did not have any Jewish generals." "No," replied the boy, "but the others did." The Lighter Side. One of the Canadians now in England is named "Tex" Lebere, hnd before enlisting he had been living in Texas. Early in his training they had not issued him a uniform, and he still wore his tengallon hat as he lounged on the rifle range. When it come to his 1 turn to shoot, he missed the target completely at 100 and 200 yards, but clipped the bull ati 500 yards. His fellow soldiers'■'couldn't understand it. "Wal, it's like this a-ways, fellahs," said Tex, giving his trousers a hitch, "Back in Texas we jest throw stones at anything 100 or 200 yards away."

Enemy Within the Country? "We can shoot one hundred and fifty babies on a good day," said Mr Suitcll, of Wellington, when addressing a public meeting on Tuesday night in connection with the St. John Ambulance Centennial Baby Contest. The speaker, of course, was using the term applied to photographing. A Matter of Population. One of the speakers at the annual meeting in Wellington of the New Zealand Society of Accountants remarked that it the population of New Zealand were doubled the debt burden per head would be halved; therefore, he urged that a vigorous policy of immigration should be undertaken as soon as world conditions would permit. "It is onr duty as accountants, to increase our population," he declared. When the laughter died down, he remarked: "Well, I've done my part; I have five children and some grandchildren." "What Cads!" The attitude of the Soviet Press and radio towards some incidents in the Russo-Finnish war suggests either a complete lack of any sense of humour or a child-like mind* The laying of tank traps by the Finns, which caused heavy losses among the Russians, occasioned the surprising remark in the influential Soviet newspaper "Pravda": ""What cads!" But the Soviet radio has gone one better. In a recent broadcast the Moscow radio warned the Finns that, unless they gave back the weapons they stole from the Russians in the Battle of Suomussalmi Russia would declare war on Finland. The Bishop and the Boy. The truth of this story is vouched for, although the characters must be nameless. It concerns a Bishop of the Church of England in New Zealand, a doting mother and rather naughty little boy. The mother and child Avere among a party being entertained to tea at the Bishop's residence. Throughout the afternoon the young guest was most trying and all the tender urgings of his parent would not persuade him to be good. It came tp the time for leavetakings and the mother told her charge: "'Now, say good-bye nicely to the dear Bishop." The Bishop took the boy's hand in. hi(s, and looking him firmly in the eye, said: "WeJl, good-bye, my little friend. And when you say your prayers to-night, you thank God that I am not your father."

Still Missing. The body has not yet been reeovered of Theo Oilman, aged nine years, son of Mr and Mrs J. Gilman. of Kawerau, who was drowned in the Tarawera River on Monday afternoon. Cricket Draw. Owing to the clubs being unable to field teams on Saturday the games will be played on Sunday commencing at 9.45 a.m. The draw is as follows: Whakatane v Hillcrest, P. and T. v Paroa. Saturday's Tennis. The following players will represent the Methodist Club against Knox Presbyterian: Misses Jacombs, Blyth, Carter, Mrs Chrisp, Mrs Wilson, Miss Oswald. Messrs Darvili. Jeftery, Cox, Lucas, Shaw, Licltlwark. Miners' Big Pay. Giving evidence in a Court action recently, an ex-licensee of a Waihi hotel said that what was knoiwn as the miners' big pay day was a busy day for him. Most of the miners would come to "the hotel and tender £5 notes in payment for drinks, and lie always prepared £100 in change, the amount being made up of bundles containing four £1 notes and two 10s notes. Disappearing Grass. There is a certain well known resident of Whakatane rather perplexed at the present time. On Wednesday evening he mowed about half an acre of lawn and carefully carried the cut grass to his compost heap. When the job was completed he had a heap four feet high. Last night he found that the heap ha(| almost entirely disappeared, only a scattering remaining to mark his labours of the night before. He has searched and found absolutely no trace. So far the services of the Police have not been enlisted, buts the resident is mj'stified.