MAN ABOUT TOWN.

Auckland Star, Volume III, Issue 618, 4 January 1872, Page 2

MAN ABOUT TOWN.

There was t> mistake about the Caledonian Gam<£ they wero a great success in every way even in a pecuniary point of view. M Kirhy, in the fulness of his heart dancefcn Irish jig in character and carried off pother two notes, at least he would havelone so had he appeared in the regular, ig of the conventional Irishman. His dicing was nevertheless aufait. The donke* races were superb, 70 donkeys enterd, but only 53 ran. It was a neck and nek race between four of them. Dudley wet on Hydes' "moke," but on going to sc. c the jockey broke the machine It was decired " no race" in consequence. The Than?s Highlanders looked fine, especially tie first day, when they dressed as lightlyas possible, some of them, too, had outgbwn their kilts or else purchased them secind-hand, as they were at least eight incies too short to be decent, but it is not t-ue that Mr Broham has laid informatioi to the sitting magistrates against my of them, although Dick said he did _ot see near so many ladies on the groundthe second day. Speaking of some o those engaged in the sports on Monda; reminds one of the tale told of a yokel, all his possessions to his bride elect; —said he, " and then I have drawee."— " Oh," she of happy anticipations rmlied. " that toill be nice, won't I clean md polish them up every week." " The* canst, said the bumpkin in astonishmeat, "they be underneath my breecies." Dick says he doubts if some of the Scotchmen could have.boasted of simihr possessions on Monday. It was worth a journey to see the tilting. Those engaged in the tournament were mounted on handsome horses, kindly lent for the occasion by the knacker upon a solemn promise to return them in time for the night's slaughtering. The riders entered the lists and rode full tilt at the rine in a manner that would have eclipsed the knights of old ; the way they grasped their lances, too, was a study in itself. One held it like a pen, the next one like a dagger, and another like a carpet bag, so determined were they to win the smiles of the fair ladies by vicing with each other in posture. Would they not have astonished the spirit of the Black Prince or he of Agincourt had they graced the tournament with their presence MM lest lark was that Campion and _fage, rho had paid heavily for their ground to sell refreshments on, had to pay for ad mission to their property and tor their Servants as well. Dick says this » out of all character, law, or reason, as, having paid for their «' pitch," they were entitled to a right of way ; he also says that when he becomes Benedict and rents a house for himself, if the landlord charges him a shilling each time for admission to the garden he will indict him for obtaining money by false pretences. But there is no similarity in the two cases. What a daring man must he of the Golden Crown Brewery be, to extend his premises at this moment with Ihe Permissive Bill staring him in tie face, as becoming law. Several totil abstainers are gloating over his futuie ruin and downfall, and are to be seeu evenevening on the Barrack Hill Surveying the scene of an expected wreck. But the brewei_ goes boldly on, __»_, t*> vise the Showman s phrase, "he not caring one straw." Dick says that when the Permissive Bill is passed he would advise the Government to put a heavy duty on opium, that there may be no deficiency in the revenue. What a spree it will be at the Police Court when the Inspector appears against himself for creating a nuisance in Fort -street. He has already laid the information, but Dick can't find out when it comes off; all he knows is, that Mr Inspector Broham prosecutes, assisted by the Inspector of Nuisances. Mr Inspector broham will plead guilty to the charge, but will also urge extenuating circumstances. In the meantime, every evening, at 9.30, a police officer is to be seen stealing down Wynyard Pier, with a bag of dead dogs in his hand. This is what Dick calls changing the venue. What a satisfaction it is to our noble volunteers that there is no Female Reformatory to defend against the attacks of foreign seamen. How gratifying to Mr Ellis, too, as he, of all others, would have felt compelled to have taken the initiative towards its defence. A war steamer is on its way to our port, and may, e'er this meets mortal eye, be already in our midst, the seamen of which vessel have actually planned and made an unsuccessful attack on a like establishment in Sydney, but were repulsed with heavy loss. For grandeur and eftect the rape of the Sabines has been quite overshadowed and put in the background by this attempt. It is as well to mention that tenders are required for the supply of six-foot rules to the City Police, to prevent any more hard swearing. It was only yesterday that a constable swore most positively and distinctly, that a driver was away from his cart more than two yards, whereas the defendant could have as distinctly proved (but unfortunately forgot to appear) that he was not away more than 5 feet 11 inches. It is rumoured that all the large carmen are providing their drays with an iron ring round, to which a chain 5 feet 10| inches long is attached, to be shackled on to the driver, to prevent

infringing this section of the Munici) Corporation Act. It is to be hoped tl a certain estimable gentlemen will

mistake any of them for his long 1< kangaroo.