A NICE SERVANT,

Auckland Star, Volume II, Issue 481, 26 July 1871, Page 2

A NICE SERVANT.

Mk. George Augustus Sala relates vi " Belgravia" the story of a young housekeeper in search of a good servant. After many unpleasant experiences, the lady, whose name was -Houselainb, engaged a certain Ellen Catt, with the following results:— . ■ . <

It happened that when she had been with us about seven months—,we never kept a servant so long before—that Mr. Houselamb being away in Paris on business, I went visiting a good deal, always leaving Our Nice Servant, in whom I had the most implicit trust and confidence, at home. It was one Sunday, and I was dining with the G-rigsbys (Mrs G-rigsby is a charming woman, but nothing to look at, and has an absurd idea that she can write poetry). It was just as I was sitting down to dinner that I discovered—l had rather hurried myself in dressing that morning —that I had left my gold watch and chain on my toilet table at home. They were very handsome trinkets, and had been presented to "me not a fortnight before by Mr Housclamb, who was then just bee inning to get on in the world. I felt raiher nervous at this discovery, and told the Grrigsbys of it; adding, however, that I outht not to trouble my mind about it, seeing that we had such a verj JNice Servant.

Mrs. Grigsby, who was always full o f her poetry andnonsonce, began to lisp out something about having " faith i n oße Mother, but Mr. Grigsby, a thorough man of business,- sh6ok his*head and ask ed me whete Our Nice Servinfcaiiie from P 1 said t{ie workhouse. He shook his head agaiu, and remarked that paupers were a very badlot. I remembered,the word of the matron to. a similar effe:ct; and still I sln-auk from doubting tlio hoaestv of Kheu Catt. J

Things passed off, but I was very nervous m the afternoon. .. It. was 9.30 o'clock when I readud home. I | et myself in with my latchkey-it had onon been Mr Hou-elanib s but I had taken it awuy from ii<n undiieverJetliim have itagaiu, after that shocking affair of hh dege £ tini ; his house aud. homo for the Garrick'l Head. Passing soltly m£ o : the hall, I

heard the voice of somebody in the kitchen singing. The voice was so deep that at first it sounded like a man's, and my mind at once jumped at the suspicion of follow- • ers ; but on listening a little longer, I was convinced that the singer was Our Nice Servant. It was Sunday evening 5 but; O dear me ! it was no hymn that Ellen Catt was singing. 80 far as I can recoHect, the \" words of her frightful song ran thus :— V , " My flash man's in quad, And I'm the woman that's wi'"n'; So, I'" muzzle a bloke to night, And c!:-aw him [of every shillin'." Chorus (she sang this almost in a yell) " To6ral, looral, 100 ! "What are wealth's possessions ? Bless the cove we love, And blow the Middlesex sessions!" I crept down stairs, more dead than alive, entered the kitchen, and thiswas the sight I saw. The cand'e was guttering down into the socket, and in front of the fire, with her feet on the fender, sat Our Nice Servant. There was a pewtei1 pot containing something on the table, also a black bottle ; and—l shudder as I write the words—when Our Nice Servant had finished a verse of her song, she took a short black pipe off the table, and began to puff at it. " Ellen Catt!" I began reproach, fully. " Ellen Catt! " she repeated, with a long bitter laugh. " Don't you Ellen Catt me, Missis ; I'm Tiger Bet—ask in the BlueAnchor fields if I ain't. I've broken out, / I have. Sit you down there and I'll make your flesh creep. The -wretched woman was evidently tipsy, but she made no violent gestures, merely swaying her head from side to 1 side, and now and then slapping her hands on one or the other of her knees. I thought I might get her to bed quietly if I humoured her a little; so I sat down in a chair by the fire, and asked her if she was ill.. .

" 111!" she replied ; " I'm jolly happy, I am. I'm all there, Missis. I went to the Los A of Hay this evening, and I met some palls, and they had me to rights, and I topped off with a deep thinker. Do you know what a deeper is ? " I confessed, feeliug quite sick at heart, that I did not, ■ . • t '■■ ■■

"O, you young innocence !" went on Our Nice Servant. " Rum and old ale,

and a red-hot poker in it —that's a deep thinker. You poor young woman, you don't know nothing. You're a dabby. Do you know who I am—what lam ? "' " iV-n-no, Ellen, I murmured. • " I'm bad," she continued—" as bad as bad can be. They don't make 'em wus

than me. I gammoned the workhouse coves. I was put in there as a stall, and to be kept out of the way, that I shouldn't go up and give hevidence against Jem." My flesh, really crept at these dreadful words.

" He only got three months on the stopper," she went on; " and no w he's out, and swears he'll do me a mischief. That's what upset me. That's why I broke out. That's'wliy I've'had a deep thinker." I thought very deeply myseJf that sho must have had a good many deep thinkers that evening, for she was quite intoxicated.

" Now, look you here," she said, suddenly turning her face towards mine, " you ain't lost nothin' since I've been here."

"• I certainly Have not, Ellen," I replied, drawing away my face, however, in some terror.

" Eight you are !" she returned, giving one knee a sounding clap: "and'vou won't lose nolhin' by me while I'm here, which won't be long. Don't be frightened, you chickabiddy. I won't do you no harm. I might a-done it? over and over agin if I liked. Over and over agin has the kiddies been at me for to leave a window open, or door unfastened, for to crack this crib."

My blood ran cold ; for, somehow, I had an idea that" cracking a crib" meant house-breaking. " But I wouldn't," Oar Nice Servant pursued ;" I wouldn't—no, hot for the Hank of England. You stick by me, and I'll stick by you. But it's time the gaff was blown. Don't you go getting such another bad bargain as me. Look here, you hinnocent 1" . ~"-.'

As she spoke she rapidly untwisted her black hair, flung off her cap, bent down her head, and showed me, at ths back of her scalp, a great deep white furrow.

"A black cock did that," she said, "with a chopper. I'd aggerwated him in consequence of his wool. He was from .New Orleans, and the judge he gave him seven years' penal. Look here," she resumed, baring her throat and showing along livid mark low down on her breast, " that was my Tom. He's broken three of my ribs too. He's broken my jaw. I ainlt got abound tooth in my head. ' L&ok here," and she bared her right arm to;the shoulder, and showed it me, all covered with scars." " That's foreign sailors with their knives. look here—" *><.•

How, far she might have continued with the exhibition of her wounds I don't know; but at this point she felj forward into the fender insensible. . • ■ . . ,

There was nothing the matter with her but too many deep thinkers. I put her to bed us fwell as I could, and sat "by her side all night trembling. She slept very soundly ; and, about seven in the morning, and iv a very quiet and respectful tone, begged me to go down stairs and get some' rest myself. She added that I had been a very kind mistress ito her, but that she knew she had misbehaved herself and that she must goL ' This strange woman exercised so strong a fascination over me that I was debating iv my miud whether it wouldn't be as well . to look over that scene in the kitchen, and allow her to resume her duties as Our Nice Servant, when, about ten o'clock in the morning, she came tome. \ \ " There's a cab at the door," she sai«fp "and my traps is in it. Give me my wages and let mo step it. What's bredins the bone'll come out in the flesh, and X waS bred to willany. If I was to stop f should have a 'deep thiuker too 4 many some night and rob and murder the whole bilin' of you. I aiu't got hothiu' to say agin you; but a happy home's not my line,, and I'm goin' for to take my,hook." * SKe took her hook, that is to say, she went away in the, cab with her trunk, and ffrani that day to this 1 never saw any nioro of,her. But of all- the servants £ have since had-^nursemaids at sistoen.and cooks at two-aud-twentyv—l havo never; found one who, for industry, neatness, wil-' liugness, honesty, and fidelity, could compare with Our Nice Servant.