SCISSORS.

Akaroa Mail and Banks Peninsula Advertiser, Volume 2, Issue 160, 29 January 1878, Page 3

SCISSORS.

It is beauty that doth oft make women proud ; it is virtue that doth make them most admired ; it is modesty that makes them seem divine.

A good story is told of an occasion twenty years ago, when Mr Ralph Waldo Emerson addressed a literary society during commencement at Middlebury, Vermont. After he had ended, the president called upon a clergyman to conclude the service with a prayer. A Massachusetts minister stepped into the pulpit Mr Emerson had just left, and uttered a remarkable prayer, of which this was one sentence : "We devoutly pray to be delivered from ever hearing any more such transcendental nonsense as we have just listened to from this sacred desk." After the benediction, Mr Emerson asked his next neighbour the name of the officiating clergyman, and, when faltering answered, with gentle simplicity remarked : " He seems a rery conscientious, plain-spoken man."

The Mark Lane Express says :—" An elaborate process of preserving eggs has been recommended by the National Butter and Cheese Association, and copied into several papers. The pickle is a combination of lime and salt. I think the lime had better be left out of the preparation, as eggs preserved in lime always taste of it. I have tried several plans of keeping eggs, and have found none so simple and effectual as that of using salt alone. Dry salt should be sprinkled over each layer of eggs so as to fill up the interstices, and cover them, and they should be kept in a dry place. I have kept them so for six months and have very rarely had a bad one. Of course the eggs should be fresh when put down."

Truth remarks :—" Will some bishop be good enough to explain to me why most men who are married by a clergyman of the Church of England are obliged to perjure themselves ? They swear to endow their wives with all their worldly goods. But before the ceremony takes place, they have generally made a settlement restricting their wives in their right over these worldly goods. If a husband acts up to the promise that he makes in the marriage ceremony, he is bound to allow his wife, during his lifetime, to spend what she likes, and to take every penny of his property when he dies."

. Madame Bonaparte of Baltimore, now over 90 years' of age, has become very feeble and does not venture' nut of -donrs.

The very fast time of nearly.,a mile n minute was made recently in a pigeon match 'between ' Homer, ' uhd Scranton, Pa. Sixty-eight- miles an hour were made some years ago, or 1)50 miles in fourteen hours. "Here is a fact equal to many of the fiction of homorousjounii.lism. Teacher ' What is the meaning of hypocrite ?' Little Girl: 'Please Mm, I don't know ; but. the neighbours say that my mother is one."— Mat/fair. A curious well exists in Wise Country, Texas, U.S. Although the well is 11 Oft deep and gives water abundantly at all times of the year, when a north wind has blown for twelve hours not a single drop of watev can be drawn. A publisher in the Far West has published a prayer-book, which is presented gratis to all churchgoers. The right-hand pages of the book contain the usual prayers, and the left-hand— advertisements.

A few mornings since a Philadelphia matron called to see her young daughter who resides on North Elevenstreet, and found her weeping bitterly. "Oh mother, take me home. My heart is broken," sobbed the daughter, throwing herself into her mother's arms. Mother (log.) : " Tell me, though the heavens fall, what outrage has he committed 1 " Blighted Life (log.) : "He swore last night when I put my cold feet to his back, , sobbed the daughter. "Is that all ?" gasped the mother. " Yes, but he never did so before. All last winter he never said a word when 1 put my cold feet to his back, and now I know he doesn't love me;" and Blighted Life's tears broke out afresh. Before the mother left she managed to convince her daughter that all the world was hollow, and that hollow as a man's back was, it was not the place for a wife's cold feet.