CHEAPEST

Observation Post, Volume 1, Issue 30, 11 December 1942, Page 12

CHEAPEST

“What are the price of the seats, mister?” “Front seats one shilling, back seats sixpence, and programme a penny.” “I’ll sit on a programme, please. The Home Guardsman patrolling the canal towing-path in the black-out heard footsteps and gave the challenge, “Who goes there?” , - Receiving the answer, “Friend,” he commanded, the unseen figure to advance three paces and be recognised. “Don’t be daft,” came the reply. “What do you think I am —a duck? I’m on the other side of the canal! ” King! was on sentry duty and had, with his pal Fliggins, been partaking freely .of “Canada Bud,” and found “Stella.” At 11.30 he was pacing his beat, somewhat unsteadily, when he saw a dark figure tottering towards him. There could be no shadow of doubt as to who it was, but Kingi challenged like the good soldier he is. “Halt", Fliggins! Who goes there? Come forward and be identified.”

I SPILLING THE BEANS. , I A man was a witness in- a hogl stealing case. He seemed to be stretch- I ing a point or two in favour of the accused, and the prosecuting attorney roared: i “Do . yoq* know the nature of an I oath? ’ ; ' “ Sure. . - , i “Do you know you are not tp bear false witness against your neighbour?” i “I’m not bearing false witness agin him. I’m bearing false witness for him. ” | A man walked into a shop and asked for a pair of boots. The assistant, a J youth of 14 showed him a suitable pair, the price being 16/6. The customer stated that he had only 13/6 with him, and inquired if he could pay that and bring the balance the next day. He was told he could. After the customer had left, the proprietor reprimanded the assistant say-, ling they would never see him again. I “Oh, but we shall,” .replied the I youth. “I wrapped up two boots for the left foot, so he’s bound to come . back. ” Lots of young couples are just two minds without a single thought.