RADIO MEN WHO DREAM ABOUT CHRISTMAS

Radio Record, 9 December 1938, Page 22

RADIO MEN WHO DREAM ABOUT CHRISTMAS

Z. Christmas for most people means days of rest . .. days of freedom .. . days in the sun.... For radio men it means days of work. But sometimes they dream of what they would do if only... The "Record’s" Auckland reporter last week asked some well-known 1ZB radio personalities, "How would you like to spend your Christmas jholidays-that is, if you could?" Here are their replies, given with hollow laughs:

Sone oe JOHN GORDON, Production Supervisor, famous at present for his newly-grown beard: I would like to spend Christmas Day-well, yes. Well, last night I ‘~had a nightmare. St. Peter came to me and said, "Come up and have a look round." The first people he took me to see were the Adoring Relatives. These, he pointed out, were among the least desirable people, their main crime being that on earth they

would insist upon telling people with adenoidal voices, "You should go on the radio, my dear." Then there was a bunch of people frantically trying to do i0 things at once-ther were trying to speak seriously, think quickly, play recordings, write logs, hunt for copy, keep cool in a high temperature, and pretend not to see a lot of people staring at them all the time. These were the people who criticise announcers. Then St. Peter took me to a little room which, he said, I could use while -I stayed with him. This was nicely fitted up with every luxury, and a little electric battery so that every time an announcer did the Wrong Thing, I had only to press this to give him a violent shock. I wondered how St. Peter, knew the pleasure I would derive from such a joy, and he said, "Well, it is Christmas time, isn’t it?" Then I awoke, and sat up in bed, and said, "That is how I should like to spend Christmas Day." DUDLEY WRATHALL, P Fr ogramme Organiser, had other ideas: Having the "Stuff. of Radio" in my veins, I would take my portable plug-in set, adjourn to some sunny beachlands where electricity was unknown and there, in between shooting, hunting and fishing, give it a double raspberry every morning, afternoon and evening. GUY NIXON, 1ZB’s youngest. announcer, has recently bought a fiddle: I can think of no more enjoy-

able way of spending Christmas than retiring to a lonely island where I can, at intervals, eat, sleep and read, but mainly be able to practise my fiddle without having unkind remarks and various objects thrown at me, I have nearly mastered one scale. BILL. MEREDITH, sports announcer: "A flask of Wine, s ‘Radio Record,’ a box of cigars, and me by myself with na radin sat Hatonine ta other

LOU PAUL, 1ZB Maori announcer: This is not what I would like to do for Christm s; in fact, I’m going to do it. That is, to have a Maori hangi with a couple of turkeys, 1 nice young pig, kumeras, and so on in it. And then sit down under a palm tree and eat it with my hands, and let everyone else who’s there do likewise. That’s what I would call a Christmas well spent.

DES. LOCK, announcer: If Christmas must be spent, I should like to spend it collecting for the §.P.C.A. ‘Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Announcers), and thus enjoy making the | public assist a most -vorthy cause. If taken at his own estimation or valuation, the announcer is the most important fellow in the worid, therefore most worthy; the public, of course, may---I say may!-think otherwise. JOHN BATTEN was much in the same vein: How would I like to spend Christmas? Swimming, eating, sleeping-mostly sleeping."

NEDDO, Children’s announcer: For some three or four years in the past, Christmas has been just another worktime, or shall I say harder. But on sitting back and closing my eyes for a while, I think that this Christmas I’d like to be -a mermaid. GRAN, of 1ZB: If you asked me how I'd like to spend Christmas in 1899, the answer would be easy. But, now, in 1938, thousands of miles separate the choice of places of then and now. Sun takes the place of snow, and years alter one’s idea of the definition of "A-Merry Christmas." However, let my wish be that I may never be too old to enjoy myself. There now, I’ve given you "absolutely free" my recipe for perpetual youth-accept it as my Christmas gift to you.

ESTELLE BOUCHER, receptionist who is "on the job" eight hours a day answering telephone calls, and is also "Stella" in 1ZB’s Hospital session: ‘ How would I like to spend Christmas? Well, being first and foremost a business woman, my immediate thought is to sub-let my job at a considerable profit. Then, for one week I would spend my time making certain that ‘the lessee had to put up with the same things en Yt do. T would ring up at least

al to the weather or ti:ne; if a programme that dic not appeal to me was broadcast I would immediately ring up and become abusive-of course, remaining, out of modesty, anonymous. Between you and me, I wouldn't change my job. I like it!" ROD TALBOT, Diggers’ session:

Without giving the matter a lot of serious thought, I have in mind some nice weather, a good fishing rod, and an appointment with some nice-sized kahawai or schnapper. But I am looking forward to, the prospect of preparing a really entertaining session for the boys in hospital. I suppose, after all, this Christmas will pass much as other Christmases have passed, but for preference, well... give me a nice-sized launch, big cnough to reach from one wave to the other without shipping some water, and a nice kind-fi.ced-looking kingfish on the end of one huncred and fifty yards of line. PETER ("UPPER") HUTT, announcer: To get myself in the right mood, I’ have to start with Gong and Time, but the "Theme" would be "There’s a Small Hotel." Well, then it would be necessary for me to win Tatts, then I might even be able to begin thinking about it. Secondly, I’d like to get out of the city for a Icng holiday, out into the wide, open spaces, where a city chap wonders at first what the unfamiliar and foreign cdour is, and then discovers that he’s really only breathing pure, fresh air, with ail the fragrance of the countryside in it. Somewhere, where there are trees and creeks instead of wire-

Away from sciatica, lumbago and gout And degenerate milk tars Where milkmaids don't "shout." Away from these brassicres, these girdles and corsets, Silk stockings, floor polish and fatse sets, Of teeth with gold pins, and Records of bagpipes and similar dins, Away from announcing and civttsation. Without morning tiredness or night