TO-DAY AND TO-MORROW

Radio Record, Volume I, Issue 24, 30 December 1927, Page 6

TO-DAY AND TO-MORROW

Cadet ‘‘Howlers.’’ An English naval schoolmaster provides these ‘howlers" of young students in a Divinity examination :- "Moses sent ten plagues to Pharoah. ‘The last one was children, so he drowned them all in the Red Sea." ‘We remember Jonah because it was through him that the idea of the submarine, occurred to modern minds.’? "When David slew Goliath with a catapult the aze of missile warfare commenced. ‘This incident drove the first nail into the coftin of feudalism." "The Queen of Sheba was the only woman of his day that King Solomon never married. Hence arose the phrase, ‘The wisdom of Solomon.’ " "Zadok was the name of an ointment much used in olden times. On the alabaster box in which it was packed was printed in Hebrew characters, ‘Rub it in." "Shimei was fined the maximum penalty by David for spitting in public.’’ FS a % Cream Cheese Without Cream. Take 4 pint lukewarm water; pour into a hasin with a pinch of salt and a small teaspoonful of rennet. When set place in muslin, tie up and hang it to drain. When firm, make up into -a small shape and press.

Spinsters of Science. _ ‘The decision of London University to grant ihe degree of B.Sc. to ladies who qualify in domestic and household science was a very wise one, Everything conducive to the proper management and administration of the home is embraced in the curriculum, and the "sweet girl graduate’ who cmerges successfully from the examination roqm is able to boast a variety of domestic knowledge before which even the once formidable Mrs. Beetin must pale her now ineffectual fires. % Bd * Time was when the marrying man looked askance at the spinster B.Sc. He had every confidence in her ability to solye an- obscure hydro-carbon, but could she make edible pastry? He never doubted that she could give correctly, to five places of decimals, the co-efficient of expansion of tungsten, but did she know just how long to boil a potato? He quite appreciated the fact that she could tell at a glathe the spectrum of sodium from that of potassium, but could she differentiate with equal certainty between Dorset aud Danish? % a * But now he will look upon the "Jady of high degree" with all such ‘doubts removed, With her mental equipment she can be trusted to run anything. lappy will he be if he can espouse her! Never will be experience the sensation of the city-weary husband, engrossed with his after-din-ner Corona and novel, being suddenly pounced upon to solye those acute mathematical problems which are usnally associated with doing the housekeeping accounts; or to explain the difference between a cheque to "bearter" and a cheque to "order’’; or to cope with a refractory kitchen chimney which has suddenly developed a "down" draught. ~ All these little problems will have already been successfully tackled in the University, and the wifely scientist will be fully competent to function unaided at these great climacterics. Yet, in spite of her specialised training, it seems safe to predict that she still jumps on a chair when a imonse runs across the room! Bo For Lovers of Verse. A new book of verse by Humbert Wolfe will make a direct and sure appeal to all loyers of Peter Pan and his home-Kensington Gardens, the latter being the designation under which these charming concerts from the pen of an exquisite craftsman are launched. They are fraught with the gaity of blossoms and the gravity of gems. ‘he Laburnum, the ‘"‘good as gold tree," is thus presented: Laburnum hangs her golden fleece Through a thousand lattices In the silken fleeces caught Struggles spring, the Argonaut. Peter Pan is called-‘‘a faun of gingerbread," while the song of the welldrilled Tulip says: ‘The craftsman, who caryed her of metal prayed: Live, oh thou lovely!" Half-metal she stayed. A sermon is found in the carven stone of "The Albert Memorial": "In his heavy monument Good Prince Albert sits all bent, Fiven death could not assuage The burden of his golden cage." And so through the pleasantries of the Gardens the reader is charmingly and willingly led. a * * A Fishing Yarn. ; An old resident of an Inglish village used to go out as attendant to gentlemen during the fishing season. "T were out- with the Bishop yesterday," he said to an etiployer one day, referring to a very wellknown and popular dignity of the Church, who is also a good fisherman. "Indeed," replied the other; "he’s a jolly good man." = ‘*Well,’"’ continued the old fellow, " ’e may be, but ’e do swear a bit when ’e’s fishin’. Oh, nonsense!’ said his employer, "I don’t believe it." "Well," said the old man, nodding his head wisely, ‘Yi gie ’ce an instance. I was standing *longside o’ the Bishop, same as might he aside o’ you, and 'e'd got a big fellow at the end of ’is line that was pretty nigh‘ pullin’ ’im_ off ’is feet, and I turns to ’is Lordship and I says, ‘’*E pulls durned ’ard, don’t ’e?? and the Bishop says, ‘Yes, ’e do.’ Well, now, ain’t that swearin’ ?" b] bse) Devonshire Apple Cake. Beat loz. of butter and loz. of sugar to a cream, add one large grated apple, one egg, and a breakfastcup of flour. If not moist enough, add a little cold water. Bake in a hot oven for Half an hour, and serve hot for tea, | | Ea is ro] a Short of Milk. : When friends look in unexpectedly in the evening and you want to offer them coffee, but are short of milk, just beat up an egg, put a small portion into each cup, and pour coffee on to it. It is delicious. Salted Almonds. ' llb. Jordan almonds, g0z. buiier,: 8 tablespoons salt. ; A Method: Blanch the melt butter in a pan, add salt, then pnt. almonds, allow to cook slowly till # nice golden brown and perfectly cris. Turn on to a pastry tray and dust salt, Keep quite airtight.