THE DIFFERENCE

Radio Record, Volume I, Issue 21, 9 December 1927, Page 6

THE DIFFERENCE

| Some sad scribess will echo the following groan from a contemporary :- A fellow may write with the best of | intent, And may put his whole heart in his rhyme, But to pen a love lyric and have what. you meant Printed wrong, is disastrous at times, A plague on the man who did set up my ay On the DIMPLES of Annabel Lee; Plague take the proof-reader, the feather-brained Jay, Who can’t tell a "D" from a "P." | Though I’ve written Annabel note after note, She’s never at home when I call, She surely must know it was DIMPLES I wrote, I never wrote PIMPLES at all, = 2 s Feminine Ferocity. A. feminine speed fiend was driving a racing sports model on a country road, accompanied by her unsporting and somewhat timid fiance. The latter was cowering in abject terror as the telegraph poles flew by until they resembled a tooth comb. A village approached, and the fair one _ yell through the roar of her engine, ‘That's a pretty village-wasn’t it?" a 2 Ld Umbrellas. We hear dismal stories all around us of slumps in this trade and that, but surely umbrella makers have bcen making hay while the sun forgot to shine! And yet there was a time (almost impossible to imagine) when such things as umbrellas were unknown to Westetn civilisation. Tlie first time an = uribrella was used in tingland was in 1760. Mr, John Hanway, a great traveller, brought it from China, and there was tremen lous excitement when he was seen walking the streets of London holding it over his head to keep the rain off. ‘he umbrella has altered very little in shape since 1750, but a German once tried to improve it by making little glass windows in the folds, so that one could keep it well down over the head and at the same time keep an eye upon the on-coming traffic. ‘This umbrella was not popuJar and did not stav, the average Britisher preferred blindly to forge his way ahead. * ® ° Reasonable! There was once a colonel of a certain cavalry regiment who was a martinet in all except his own habits. On one occasion the regiment was about to start on a long march, and orders were. issued that baggage shovld be reduced to a minimum. A lieutenant of the squadron had just received from his father a small box of books, and asked the colenel if he might take it along. "Certainly not, sir,’ roared the chief. "l’m very sorty, colonel," answered the lientenant, "it will be very dull ont there without any reading. My father sent me a case of whisky, but of course I couldn’t take that?" "Not take it?" again roared the colonel. "Certainly you ean, Anything in reason." q w 3

An Opportunist. A man went into a jeweller’s shop one day. "I wish you would fix this watch for me," he said, "something’s the matter with it.’ The jeweller examined it carefully, "I don’t see anye thing wrong with it," he said. ‘Well,’* said the man, "it’s lost a minute in the last three months." "That’s nothing to worry about," answered the jeweller with a smile. "Aren’t some of the works brokea or some of the jewels lost or something?" asked the other. ‘The jeweller looked at it again. "No,? he said, "everything is O.K." Still the man didn’t seem satisfied. ‘Well,’ he said, "I’ve suspected lately that the case is plate, What do you say??? "Solid gold,’ replied the jeweller, "None better? "Well, I’m glad to. hear you say that," said the man cheerfully; "then perhaps you wonldn’t mind letting me have fifty on it." bs] * 2 Christmas Cake, Take Ub. butter, beat to a cream with llb. brown sugar, add half a teaspoonful almond essence, six drops of vaniJla, and six drops of lemon essence, Add eight eggs, one by one, beating in one spoonful of flour after each egg. Sift in 1}Hb, of flour, then add 4Ib, of mixed fruit, carefully cleaned and dried. This includes lemon and cherry peel, sultanas, and currants, and lastly, half a teacupfnl of brandy or whisky. Put the mixture into a tin lined with several thicknesses of paper, when the oven temperature reaches 400 degrees put it in; turn the element to medium for about one hour, then to low for another two hours 3 then right off, and leave the cake in for at least a couple of hours after this. If an old scone tray or sponge tin is turned upside down onl the shelf directly below the cake it will keep it quite moist at the hot-tom.-Mrs, Sinclair, 2VA, * * Dd Latest statistics show that married women live longer than their single sisters. Mr, Henpeck, who draws onr attention to the fact, adds that on ee asion statistics cam be very cruel,