STATIC SPARKS

Radio Record, Volume I, Issue 2, 29 July 1927, Page 15

STATIC SPARKS

A little girl came home from school because her teacher was ill and could not be there. ‘The child’s mother said: "You must haye been very sorry .to hear that your teacher was ill.’ ‘'Oh yes, mother," the little girl answered, ‘but I couldn’t Help clapping my hands under my breath.’ Student: I have a cold or something in my head. Professor: A cold, nundonbtedly ! The car was going faster and faster down the hill. "I'd give ten pounds to be"‘out of this," said the nervous wife. | "Keep your money," replied the hus-_ band, who was driving, ‘‘you’ll be out for nothing in a minute.’’ An egg-site-ing occupation-birds looking for nesting places. | How to get the best out of asbestosomit the middle syllable. "Ready for the fray," said the washerwoman, getting to work on the collars. A small boy, watching his mother frying fish, noticed one with its tail turned up. "Oh, muminy," he exclaimed, ‘‘that one must have been turning a corner when it got canght!" Employer: ‘Jommy, how many times have I told you not to whistle at your work? Tommy (cheerfully): It’s all right, sir, I’m not working-l’m only whistling. Do you say your hens sit or sat? asked the precise schoolmaster of the busy housewife. ‘It never matters to me what I say,’ was the quick reply. "What concerns me is to learn, when 1 hear the hen cackling, whether she is laying or lying." "Pye been trying to think of a particular word for two whole weeks.’’ "Well, how would fortnight do?" Peggy (saying her prayers): ‘‘Please, God, make me a good girl --." Mother (prompting): "And --." Peggy: "And if at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try again.’ Constable: ‘‘What’s the idea of racing through this town at sixty miles an hour??? Speed fiend: ‘Well, you see, something’s gone wrong with my brakes, so I’m trying to get home before I have an accident!’’