The Storyteller

New Zealand Tablet, 21 December 1911, Page 2563

The Storyteller

CHARLIE GREEN'S GHOST Now, look here, Charlie, it's all nonsense for you to talk like that. Why, such a thing is impossible in my house,' and Sir Roger Bentley looked righteously indignant. ' I tell you what it is, my boy, you must have gone to sleep lying on your back, or ate too much supper last night, and bad dreams were the result. Ghosts? Ha! ha! ha! What do you think of that, you fellows V Sir Roger winked slyly at half a dozen men who made up the party in the smoking-room. ' Here's dear old Charlie Green making the very serious statement that he saw a ghost in the blue room last night. Isn't that so, Charlie?' and the hand belonging to fourteen-stone of Sir Roger fell heartily on the small space allotted to Charlie for a back. 'Oh-er!' gasped Charlie Green. 'Yes. I—l did really see a ghost. "It was awful,' and he squirmed his back into position again. 'Rot!' said two or three laconically, while the others tried hard to smother their laughter. ' What was it like, and what did it do?' said his host from the window in a muffled voice. 'Oh, don't ask me I shall never get over it/ he moaned, ' andit's coming again 'Coming again?' they all ejaculated. 'How do \you know?' 'By w—what it said,' quivered the thin voice. ' It was striking three when a' terrible bloodcurdling noise awoke me with a sudden start. It was like the noise a dog makes when it's listening to a German band, or the steam syren of a tug. I sat up in bed without knowing it, and there, standing by the bedside, was the most fiendish spectacle you ever saw. Its eyes were large, and shot fire, and 'its cruel-looking face shone with the light of another world—but, I say, what's the matter with Freddy Vane ?' and Green broke off in his recital to look wonderingly at a young man wriggling about on a couch with his head buried in a cushion. In a moment or two Vane stopped his contortions, and looked up with disordered hair and flushed face. ' It's all right, Charlie,' he muttered brokenly. 'Don't mind me. It was the gh-grapes ; they've given me the stomach-ache. I ate some a little while ago,' and Freddy assumed what he thought to be an expression of pain, but in reality it looked as if one side of his face had been stricken with paralysis. Sundry coughs and blowing of noses sounded in the room as Charles resumed his narrative of the night's experience. a ' Yes, I was frightened into utter helplessness. I could feel my hair going all curly, and I fully expected to find it white with the fright this morning, and it will be r he cried, with his face in his hands. _ 'Come, Charlie, be a man, and finish your tale,' said Bentley's strong authoritative voice. ' Why should a ghost want to haunt you? Now if it were that rascal Vane there with his six feet of mischief I could understand such a thing, and he would deserve all he got.' Steadying his voice, Charlie continued: ' The Thing looked at me with its piercing eyes, and came closer. All the time something kept running up and down my back, then I tried to hold up my hand to ward off whatever was coming, but like every other limb my arm wouldn't work. I thought I was going mad, when the silence was broken by a deep voice. Pointing a long finger at me, which also seemed aglow with a mysterious light, It said slowly, "You think vou can see through me, but you cannot; I can see through you though," and it was quite right, too! It was not like the ghosts you read about—transparent, and all that—but apparently came from another district where thev thicken them.' J A long roar of resounding laughter greeted Charles' last words, and thankful sighs of relief were breathed at an opportunity of relieving pent-up feelings. Charlie stared at the outburst, but had no suspicions ' What else did your precious ghost say, Charlie?' asked Sir Roger, when the noise had died away

' ' It—it said,' Green replied, his voice faltering again, '"I think I know who you are, and by tomorrow night I shall have made certain." And then it glided to the end of the bed and muttered, "He was only a little insignificant half-man just like this one. ./*< The wart is in the same place, too ! Just on the bridge 'jfff of the nose, and his glasses rested on it. How it " annoyed me! Do you wear glasses?" it said, turning on me fiercely. " No, sir, thank you," I replied, as well as I could speak, " but I will if you like." "Do so at your peril. To-morrow night I shall come to warn you to prepare for your end, and the next night —you die!'.' He gave an empty sort of chuckle as though he were hungry, and holding up both his arms in the way you see in pictures, stalked from the room. I couldn't help thinking it strange, though, when I put my hand outside the bed-clothes some time after to get a little fresh air, that the ghost who's going to kill me to-morrow night had to lower one arm to open the door. I expected to see him walk through it. But it doesn't matter!' poor Charlie declared hopelessly. 'Nothing matters now. It will be Boxing Day, won't it, you chaps? And then I shall be boxed up,' and he laughed mirthlesslsy at his own joke. ' Come, come, Green, my boy, surely you are not afraid of an alleged ghost. True,' said Sir Roger thoughtfully, ' some parts of this place do date back to the sixteenth century, and the blue room is one, but I tell you what I will do; put you in another room where Va— ghost, I mean- —cannot find you. Now, then, Vane,' he continued quickly to cover up his slip of the you must exchange with Charlie, and let him have a peaceful night to-night.' • Certainly, Sir Roger,' Vane replied courteously, ' I shall be most happy to oblige you, and if Charlie thinks he will have a more restful night in my present room ' —a fit of coughing stopped him for a moment 'he is quite welcome to it.' 'Thanks awfully, Vane,' said Charlie, relieved beyond measure. 'I certainly will accept your offer.' 'That's settled, then,' exclaimed Sir Roger Bentley. ' Now come and join the ladies. We mustn't keep Christmas all by ourselves.' The next. morning, Christmas Day, Charlie Green crawled into the breakfast-room and literally dropped into a chair without, as he thought, attracting attention. Covert glances, however, were shot in his direction by the men of the party, and sundry sly winks passed between them. Poor Green looked decidedly seedy, and the resigned expression which every now and then came over his face was extremely funny. He would throw up his eyes, and the corners of his mouth would droop, while a deep sigh would proceed from his half-open, mouth. Good gracious, Mr. Green!' said a vivacious little lady sitting next to him, ' are you practising for a tableau ? What a weird, uncanny character! How can you do it? But there, some men have such peculiar faces. They can do what they like with them.' ' Quite right, Mrs. Firth,' joined in Sir Roger jovially from the top of the table. ' With the aid of a little paint and things some men can make themselves look perfect demons,' and Bentley's eyes caught Vane's, who smiled broadly. ' While the ladies get ready for a canter across the Downs, we'll adjourn to the smokingroom,' said the master of the house after a short pause, beckoning Charlie to follow him. / 'Now, then, Green, my boy, what sort of a night did you have V asked Sir Roger cheerfully, after everyone had got their pipes or cigars going well. 'Awful! I thank you, Sir Roger. Simply awful! and the worst is to come,' said Charlie in a toneless voice. : 'What!' shouted Bentley, 'do you mean to say that the same rascally ghost has dared to enter the sacred chamber where King George the something—l forgot which of the four it wasslept?' Charlie nodded listlessly.': It mattered little to him who had slept there. He hadn't. All he knew was that at one period of the night he had experienced the temperature of the arctic regions, while at another he was plunged into a Turkish bath of the hottest description, with periodical gusts of cold wind" coming from somewhere. °

' Confound him !' roared Sir Roger. 'To desecrate with his sulphurous presence the room reserved for distinguished visitors only. Where is he? I'll break every bone in his body I' and he spoke with such spirit, and glared so viciously, that Freddy Vane thought it prudent to shift his seat farther back. 'What did the ghost say this time?' one of the men interposed soothingly, to cool the air somewhat. ' Oh, he didn't say very much, but it was to the point. You can't help me, any of you. I have just got to die. In what way I don't know yet, but it will be in the small hours of to-morrow— Day when you will all be dreaming of the jolly times you are going to have. Never mind. Enjoy yourselves. Life is still you ' 'Shut up, you maundering idiot cried Vane sharply. .'You don't suppose for a moment we are going to let a ghost roam from room to room in this fine old ancestral mansion— and polish people off without any rhyme or reason ? .' Ah! that's just it!' said Charlie, in a despondent voice. 'He has a reason. He said something last night about my great grandfather meeting him in' mortal combat, and my old grand-dad, it appears, got in first blow.' Charlie spoke quite proudly'as he added, 'You see, they fought with hatchets in those days, which they held with both hands, and so there wasn't any need for a second whack. Now, this ghost is trying to make out that our side took a mean advantage, and didn't swing the hatchet the regulation number of times. Had my great grand-dad done so, the ghost would have got home first, so I reckon Grandfather Green the Great was pretty cute in getting enough weigh on to kill his man under the regulation number of swings.' Charlie's voice soon resumed its former dull tones as he went on to say, ' Now I have got to die instead. Why he has chosen me I'm sure I don't know.' And the other members of the party also expressed their astonishment. ' But we sha'n't let him kill you, Charlie, my boy,' said Sir Roger, cheerily. ' This bloodthirsty ghost must not interfere with my guests like that, you know. I don't mind a quiet, reasonable chat and a talk over old times, now that it is Christmas-time. Ghosts, like everyone else, must have a little license at this time of the year, and al lthe while they are peaceable they are welcome to any pleasure they may derive these cold nights by walking about the passages and stairs in my house. But when it comes to talking of killing, then they must transfer their custom elsewhere.' Sir Roger spoke in decisive tones, as if the matter was settled without any occasion for further discussion. ' B-but, Sir Roger, how are you going to stop him from committing the fatal deed asked Charlie, in desperation. ' Um-yes! There is that to be thought of, isn't there ? Ah! I have it! cried Sir Roger, jubilantly. Charlie looked up eagerly, a faint ray of hope illuminating his mournful countenance. ' You shall have my room, and I will lock the door myself, and all the ghosts in existencetransparent or thick—won't be able to touch you there! That's a capital idea! The ghost will think I'm sleeping there, and won't dare to come near!' Charlie looked dubious. ' Come along, all of you. The horses are ready and the ladies are waiting. A glorious scamper to the Bars on a crisp morning like this is the finest antidote on earth for mouldy ghosts, Charlie. Here we are, ladies ! Mind the mistletoe, Mrs. Frith ! Charlie Green here is a terror. What's that, Vane? No, I didn't say "in a terror." What do you mean, sir?' After a long day of pleasure the time at length arrived for retiring-a time dreaded, indeed, by Charlie, despite his host's confident assurances. He felt very tired, but fully expected that his next sleep would be the long one from which there was no awakening. Sir Roger saw him to his room, and looked under the bed and into every cupboard to assure Charlie that no one was hidden in any likely spot. Then, patting the dejected man gently on the back, he told him to . cheer up and think no more of ghosts, but jump into bed and sleep soundly till the morning, 8

' Thank you. ' I will try,' Charlie replied, trying to speak bravely and hide the quaver in his voice. Sir Roger locked the door ostentatiously, and walked off whistling the tune of a comic song. In the ■ bedroom where Charlie had slept the previous night, •-[the other men were gathered, talking and laughing quietly amongst themselves. Presently their host joined them. ' Ha! ha! he laughed. ' What a poor little foolish fellow he is. How on earth he can be taken in so easily I can't conceive. Perhaps when he sees what, a conummate ass he has been it may sharpen up his wits a bit. I don't wonder at his losing £BOO by the timehonored confidence trick. Fancy believing in such things as ghosts, and not seeing through so palpably crude a disguise, for I must say you make up jolly badly, Freddy. Poor little Charlie. He'll hide his head under the sheets to-night for shame, not fright. • But I do hope we'll make a man of him,' he concluded, earnestly. The conversation was desultory, and turned on various topics until Sir Roger roused himself with a gigantic yawn, and said, mockingly, in a hollow voice: 1 The bewitching hour of three is about to strike, and the death-dealing ghost starts forth on his quest for blood. Come on, Vane, you idiot. What's the matter? Bitten your tongue or sot the toothache V ' Neither,' replied Vane, shortly. ' Swallowed some paint.' 'Hard luck, old chap; mind you don't swallow the brush,' to which no answer was vouchsafed. Creeping softly in their stockinged feet, the party of men, without any disturbance or noise, reached the room in which lay their victim. Vane opened the door silently, and immediately blew his syren whistle. In a moment the doomed man, as he fully believed himself to be, was sitting bolt upright in bed. Beads of perspiration poured down his

face, and his breath came in quick gasps. He tried to speak, but no sound came, and he looked imploringly at his tormenter. Vane had no mind to prolong the agony of • the poor wretch, and he decided to bring about the denouement as quickly as possible. Speaking in the sepulchral tone he had adopted all through, he said: 'ln two minutes the clock will strike thrie, and—er—it will then be three o'clock,' he added, forgetting what he had intended to say. ' I do not propose to kill you in cold blood, or warm for that matter, so I have brought these two revolvers, but you must not do as your great grandfather did.' You must not shoot until I tell you to. Do you hear?' ' Y'yes, sir, I heard. I won't shoot, really. You do it for me. Oh, dear! Ido wish my back would leave off running about,' he moaned. 'Have you ever used a revolver?' the ghost demanded. , ■ Yes —no —l mean, I don't think so. But it doesn't matter, does it?' Vane muttered a bad word beneath his breath, and next ordered the shaking man to jump out of bed. He then handed Charlie one of the weapens. ' Now,' said the ghost, ' we will stand on either side of your bed, and I will count ten. As soon as ten has left my mouth you are at liberty to fire—but I shall be first,' he added with a low chuckle. ' Are you ready ? ■ ' One moment, please, I can't .find the thing you pull to make it go off. Will you show me, Mr. V Charlie asked, inquiringly. 'Mr. V repeated the ghost. 'Of course that reminds me. We have not exchanged names. My name is Green, and yours is ?' 'Mine is Green, too Charlie Green.', 'What!' shrieked the ghost. 'Do you mean to tell me that your name isn't Kean, and that your greatgrandfather Kean didn't kill me in unfair combat?'

' Certainly my name isn't Kean,' Charlie returned, growing bolder, ' and what my great-grandfather did when he was alive is no concern of mine. But,' as a bright idea struck him, ' I reckon you are my greatgrandfather, or, at least, his ghost, and surely you would not kill the only surviving male member of the good old stock.' One or two guffaws outside the door followed this piece of cool conceit, and Charlie looked round inquiringly. ' Kean and Green, they are very similar,' the ghost was saying to himself, 'lf Green were Kean I should shoot him dead,' and he pointed the revolver at Charlie, who promptly ducked under the bed, ' but as Kean seems to be Green, he must be allowed to spout, or in another word, live.' Charles stood up. ' You have had a jolly narrow escape,' and to the happy man the phraseology and voice sounded strangely familiar. ' Let it be a lesson to you to ' but here the ghost gave vent to a very unghostly yawn, and seeing that Charlie was on the verge of discovery, he hastened matters by pointing to the door, and shouting, 'Look!' Charlie turned his head in the direction indicated, only to be met with wild shouts of glee and laughter at his discomfiture from a crowd of men at the door. Looking back across the bed the bewildered man saw that the ghost'had disappeared, and dare-devil Freddy Vane stood grinning broadly in its place. For a moment Charlie felt like sinking to the floor, and sobbing his heart out for very shame, but a voice seemed to whisper, ' Be a man, and take it standing.' Charlie walked round the room without saying a word, and did the very best possible thing he could. He held out his hand to Vane,' and shook it firmly. He then crossed to the door, and shook the hand of each one in turn. Then he spoke. ' I see now your object in —what shall I call escapade,' he said slowly, with a determined ring

in his thin voice. 'lt was not so much to frighten hie as to show by its very transparent absurdity how simple and childish I am. How easily I can be taken in and deceived. You sought to bring home to me in a manner which I believe in my case was absolutely necessary, the deficits and weak points in the formation of my character. In short, you wanted to make a man of me. Gentlemen, I thank you. You tried a bold' cure, and you have succeeded. Your object is attained. Good-night!' . ' ' Three cheers for Charlie Green!' shouted Sir Roger in an outburst of joy, and the cheers rang forth from half-a-dozen lusty throats, quite regardless of the sleepers in the house. Charlie merely bowed his acknowledgments, and from that day no reference was ever made by a member of that Christmas party to ' Charlie Green's Ghost.' — Catholic Weekly.