DIFFICULTIES OF CONDUCTING A PAPER.

New Zealand Tablet, Volume IV, Issue 193, 8 December 1876, Page 7

DIFFICULTIES OF CONDUCTING A PAPER.

1H";1 H"; following amusing description of the difficulties of an editor who h-ies to please everybody is from the ' Independent.' It ia applicable sometimes to Catholic as well as Protestants editors -—A visitor at the office of the 'National Baptist' asked the editor where he should call for Dr. Dobbs, he was informed that, under our free constitution, he might call for him anywhere, and as loud as he pleased. The following is the concluding part of a lecture by the learned Doctor, in which he describes a visit to an editor in "Antipode:'—" Toward the close of my last interview with the Antipode editor, anxious to get all the light I could, I said to him : Do you have much success in trying to please everybody ?' He replied : ' Nary.' Said I : 'Do you always find that people know just what they want ?' He replied by taking from a pigeon hole a package of letters from complaining readers, and he read passages out of them. One wrote: •We want more articles discussing the fundamental doctrines of Christianity and -of denomination.' Another: 'We want more short, practical religious articles. Another : ' You ought to have a sermon a week/ Another : 'We want stories for the children.' Another: ' You must have more news from the churches, accounts of revivals, etc. That is the life of the paper.' Another : 'We want more religious selections.' Another said: 'There must be more about the temperance question.' Another : ' I cannot take the paper unless it exposes the iniquities of the Anti-Christian secret societies.' Another: 'We must have this great anti-tobacco reform kept constantly before the people/ Another : 'We must have more for the farmer.' Another : ' There must be more from the eastern section of the field/ And another : ' The Western section must have more space.' Another : ' The country pastors must not be so ignored. Why do wghave a° sermons from the country ministers?' Another: ' What we want is a sermon every week by Spurgeon.' " " ' Meanwhile/ said the editor, 'no one wishes any less of any department, except that all unite in regretting the space devoted to advertisements. On one point all were agreed. Each and several was of opinion that nothing would do the paper so much good as to publish his communication in full in the most prominent place. And no one offered any suggestion as to making the paper ten times its present size/ ♦ Well,' said I, ' what do you do in the premises ?' 'Do ? said he. ' Why, what can we do, but fall back on -SJsop's fable, improved and amended and enlarged for the present time ?' '»"»**> J° v mean?' said I. 'Why, you remember the fable about the old man and his son and the ass. You reinenilje* that first the old man rode, while the son walked. Then all the.pepple cried : ' See that lazy wretch riding, and making his poor little son walk/ So the son rode, and father walked. Then the people said: ' See that undutiful whelp riding; while his gray-haired old father y totters along on foot/ So they got off, and both walked. Then ' the people said : 'Oh! what fools, to walk when they have a great, strong ass to carry them. Then they both got on and rode. And then the people said : ♦ Oh ! the cruel monsters, to overload that poor little ass/ Then the father and son took up the ass and carried him. And then the people shouted louder than ever : * Oh ! do see ! Carrying the ass in their arms !' Finally the old man said o his son : 'My boy, it is no use to try to please them. Let u§

please ourselves.' ' Oh ! yes/ said I ; ' I remember that.* 'But do you know what became of the ass ?' he said. ' No/ said I. ' Well, the ass became the editor of a paper, and tried to please every one and to displease nobody.' "