Noises in the Night

New Zealand Listener, Volume 31, Issue 783, 23 July 1954, Page 4

Noises in the Night

T is very hard to keep up with medical science. New theories are almost as plentiful as drugs, and their effects are roughly the same: they put things a little out of focus. There is, for instance, the question of snoring. Generations of men, denying that they snored themselves, have deplored the habit in others; but nobody has ever suggested that it was more than a slight physical weakness, a symptom of congestion in passages from the nose. Recently, however, a London doctor explained to a B.M.A. convention in Glasgow that "a wife kept awake by her husband’s persistent snoring could be encouraged to believe that it was really a sign of deep affection." It had been suggested, he went on, "that snoring is based on a race memory and that, atavistically, the male made the noise at night to . keep away marauders from the This theory looks uncommonly like an attempt to soothe the wounded pride of men who suffer a little from adenoidal obstruction. "It is usually the male who snores," said the doctor, "and the women are singularly tolerant." Men are sensitive about any loss of dignity or control. Their defence hitherto has been a flat rebuttal of allegations of snoring. Now, of course, they can be freed from uneasiness. A theory has been found which, if widely adopted, will convert the shamefaced snorer into a proud practitioner. More than that, it exalts him to the congenial role of protector. He is free to snore as robustly as he wishes, knowing that the wife who lies wakefully beside him will be less than dutiful if she is not grateful for his display of deep affection. There are, however, a few doubts which may linger in sceptical minds. The range of snoring is almost as wide as the repertoire of a concert singer. It can move from a low and snarling note to a tremulous whistling. A marauder outside a cave in prehistoric darkness would not be intimidated by

the thin piping which issues sometimes from sleeping males. Moreover, the theory rests too heavily on the assumption that the female is the weaker sex-an assumption which has long been questioned in the best scientific circles. A more plausible reconstruction of the prehistoric scene would probably show us the male snoring to keep up his courage, while beside him his deadlier mate lay in silent readiness to defend the cave and family. This protective function is still in use. It is by no means uncommon for a man to snore so loudly that he wakes himselfand starting up in bed, the horrid echoes still in his ears, stares wildly into the darkness and cries out: "What was that?" And from close beside him comes the soothing voice: "It’s all right, dear. Go back to sleep." Very different is a man’s reaction to a snoring wife. If the doctor’s theory were correct, male intolerance would probably have to be explained as part of an unresolved struggle for mastery between the sexes. The male must be dominant: it is intolerable that his mate should set herself up as defender of the cave, announcing to marauders that in this part of the woods they will have to deal with a woman. His true attitude is a little different and more complex. For one thing, he is being kept awake; and although it is fair enough for a wife to accept wakefulness as a conjugal duty, it is an offence against nature for the husband-the breadwinner who goes out daily to do battle in the jungle of stone and asphaltto be denied his proper rest. Further, he has ideas about ‘femininity; and these are painfully shattered by a soprano trumpeting. Therefore, he lies and broods, a man destined to be unhappy. There is more in snoring than doctors know of; and only wives, who have ample opportunity for studying the matter, can decide if it is a blessing, an entertainment, or a nuisance.