"TO A JET PILOT"

New Zealand Listener, Volume 25, Issue 649, 7 December 1951, Page 7

"TO A JET PILOT"

Sir,-As there is no evidence to support a belief that you have examined the poem "To a Jet Pilot" by James Baxter (Listener, November 16), I feel I am not being presumptuous in suggesting a detailed perusal not only by you, but also by those who blindly venerate Baxter’s® writings, Apart from the slang used and the too obvious statements which can only be criticised on the grounds of good taste, I would point out that the poem is constructed in such a manner that it presents an unhappy conflict between the accepted poetical technique embodying both rhyme and metre, and a certain emotive rhythm pertaining only to Poetry in the Eliot style, A closer examination discloses many faults. For example, the use of the word "amorous" to describe "vault." Surely Baxter could have drawn a more suitable adjective from his-no doubt-extensive vocabulary? Supposing that some continuity exists in the text of the poem, one must object to the closing line of the first stanza, I am forced to assume that the "lads" are looking up from the "shop-girls’ breasts." Delightful, although I hardly imagine Baxter intended tg convey such an impression. Also, why "a-flower?" One can only hazard a guess at its significance, for the emotional impact of the word is insufficient to warrant its inclusion in the poem. ‘"Mene, mene; tekel . . . " What prompted this biblical quotation-this indulgence in profundity? A desire *to impress his reading public? In the third stanza one criticises Baxter’s use of the distasteful word "wormsmeat," and the too obvious cliche "bundle of nerves." The fourth stanza also possesses many faults, For example, the nonsensical passage, "the cowering houses under your thunderbird: are wounds to prove you liar and vulnerable flesh." If a comma is placed after" the word "liar," some semblance of coherency is attained, although the phrase "and vulnerable flesh"

shows nothing more than an unsuccessful attempt to make use of the emotive afterthought, a technique employed by superior poets. : The ‘concluding line may be interpreted in several ways. Is Baxter assuming that the essence of God is the essence of the reality he has attempted to portray, or does he believe that God’s fire will be a result of this teality? Or is this just another of his pointless obscurities? One cannot condone poetry of this nature. Are we in this country so deep in the mire of pseudo-intellectualism ‘that we are unable to distinguish between the pretentious aspirant and the, genuine literary artificer? It would appear so,

DAVID R.

WATSON

(Dunedin),

( Abridged.--Ed.)