Christmas With Orphans

New Zealand Listener, Volume 20, Issue 500, 21 January 1949, Page 10

Christmas With Orphans

To the Editor-SIR,.-This is reopening a controversy, but it is Christmas that reopened it, not the writer. When Mrs. Mirams answered her critics she ended with this: "I cannot agree that a child’s need for security is met in an Institution. He still has no background, or, at best, an | unhappy one, and he later enters a cold world as an isolated unit." I wish she could have spent this last Christmas with us in our "Institution," to have watched, for_instance, our prettily decoratéd dining toom-a _ gay scene of bright young lasses dancing with our boys, and ex-boys (ote of the latter bringing his newly-engaged fiancee with him), the mantelshelf and wall decorated with cards, messages and gifts, surprisingly generous ones, from ex-boys, some of whom now have children of their own, but still do not forget their "background." — They honour it, visit it at intervals, sometimes bringing a newly-married wife, or child or children, the latter sometimes to be christened in the little village church which they have never forgotten as a grand part of that "background." "An isolated unit!" Boxing Day was made happier for us by the arrival of six ex-boys (two from outback farms whom we hadn’t seen for at least a year, in town*for the holidays), all rattling up in a £10 bone-shaker of a car (spare parts carfied in a preserving jar!) on which they mean to have a "fishin’ and huntin’" holiday in the backblocks. As a Christmas gift for our present boys, they had brought a couple of gallons (it seemed) of icecream, and some of these lads have only an apprentice’s wage! No "isolated unit" about them! They looked far happier, more capable, independent and worthwhile than any pampered youth from a well-to-do town home, with father’s car probably at his beck and call.

They were "straight of limb, true of eye, steady and aglow," and they left us "aglow" too, in pride and honour. No background! ‘They ‘have youth, health, and a disciplined upbringing. They learned, very young, to pull their full weight as citizens, and, better still, to know real work as the joy it is. The boys at present with us gave, this Christmas, to the leper funds of the churches we attend, just as they have given generously, all through the years, to any good cause put befofe them. They love to give, and do it as a Givic duty, as all youngsters will, when it is put to them. This "giving" instead of just constantly "receiving" helps immeasurably to build that "background" which Mrs. Mirams declares so defifiitely is lacking in children brought up in an "Institution." Other joys come to mind too. One is the fact that the family do hot want to camp out this year. Home is so good, the river swimming is excellent, and boys are, by nature, conservative. Home, and one’s own surroundings, take a lot of beating evidently. Then, the combined children’s Christmas party, when small brothers and sisters from the two town homes or "Houses" joined us. There was no set programme, and all the youngsters desired, evidetitly, was to be pulled or pushed round the farm on_ trolleys, sledges, bafrows, anything as long as a big boy was attached to it; and the gentleness of these big boys to little ones, and their amazing tolerance of "cheek" from their juniots hete is a constant joy and amazement to us. Boys are nice to know, As long as one one is ufutterfably just, they a grand people to live with. With much of which Mrs. Siidine writes, I agree. Cottage homes are the ideal; families, except in very rare cases, should not be broken up; and much needs to be done in New Zealand to prevent unworthy parents from so lightly escaping their tesponsibilities. The crying need for trained psychiatric help is, at times, very worrying. Much remains to be done, but there is still a great» deal Mrs. Mifams has not seen, We would be glad to welcome her as a

guest, any time.

H.

S.

(Hawke’s Bay),